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13 Emotions Everyone Who Hates Voicemails Knows All Too Well

A tale of suspense and horror.

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2. Checking the Number: You feel moderate to extreme annoyance, as you stop in the middle of your Candy Crush game to see who is calling.

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Nine times out of ten, it's your mom. The other time? A total mystery. A total, very annoying mystery.

3. The Realization: You feel a cold shiver work its way down your spine. They. Left. A. VOICEMAIL.

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You see that this person not only CALLED, he or she or IT has left a MESSAGE. In what unholy abyss was this creature forged?


5. The Deterioration of Time and Space as They Slide Against the Walls of Reality Like Pasta on a Refrigerator Door: You feel shame.

Relativity Media / Via

I am paying for something. I have trespassed in some way, and now I am paying for it. I am sitting here with my phone in my hand and my heart in my throat and all is darkness and pain. Unceasing. Unyielding. Unrelenting. Forever.

7. The Voicemail Notification Icon: You feel fear, the breadth and width and depth of which you have never felt before.

It stares at you. It is all-seeing and all-knowing. It feeds on your pain and delights in your fear.

8. Checking the Voicemail: You feel a deep, sharp anxiety.

HBO / Via

You do not even know what you're so afraid of. This fear has no name. This fear of a strange voice in your ear. A strange, message-leaving voice.


11. Thinking About Calling Back: You feel trapped as you make up excuses not to call.

Comedy Central / Via

The only thing worse than having to listen to a voicemail is having to call back whatever writhing elder god leaves voicemails.

13. The Sequel: They call back. And you complete your spiral into madness.

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"Villains!" you shriek, "dissemble no more! I admit the deed! --tear up my phone contract! here, here! --It is the ringing of this hideous phone!"