1.
First of all: We never mean to ruin your plans.
2.
When we RSVP "YES" to something, we're actually usually pretty excited to go.
3.
...In fact, the actual flakiness tends to hit the day OF the event.
4.
Sometimes we even get all dressed up to go somewhere and flake RIGHT BEFORE.
5.
Not everyone who's flaky is anti-social. Some people flake because they made too many plans.
6.
Look, sometimes we flake because we've had a rough day at work or school and deserve time alone.
7.
And sometimes we flake because something better came along. RUDE BUT TRUE.
8.
I mean, honestly, flaking definitely makes us feel guilty...
9.
...But that guilt is swiftly counteracted by the RUSH of canceling plans.
10.
We think of deadlines as gentle suggestions.
11.
And group projects? Prime for flake-age, honestly. We'll do our part at home, alone.
12.
And of course we're also annoyed by (other) flaky people.
13.
OK, yes, nine times out of 10, "I have food poisoning" is a lie.
14.
We've lyingly killed off so many family members to get out of going to things, we practically need to make a spreadsheet to keep track.
15.
But we come up with these excuses because, while we don't want to hang out with you right now or ever, we still LOVE YOU!
16.
After all, the truth would just be devastating to the ones we adore.
17.
No, of course we didn't really "forget" to call you back.
18.
Also we figure that if we've talked to you online, there's really no NEED to later hang out in person.
19.
Most of the time, we know people don't believe us. Even when we're being honest about why we need to flake!
20.
It takes a long time to admit you're a flake.
21.
And we always hold on to the belief that, next time, we won't flake.
