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In Defense Of Fruitcake

You're nutty as a fruitcake.

Guys. Can we talk about fruitcake for a second?

1. A lot of fruitcake's bad rep stems from people's seeming inability to take a nice picture of it.

...But look what some nice lighting and arrangement can do:

2. But more often than not, the anti-fruitcake sentiment is ill-conceived hatred-bandwagoning.

Be real: Have you even TASTED it? DON'T BE A SHEEP.

3. I mean, it can be soaked in booze.

4. And the recipe is quite versatile.

Like those weird green cherries? Put in a bunch. Hate nuts? Don't include them. Swap the cherries for apricots. Add figs. Include almonds and walnuts but not cashews. Coat the whole thing in powdered sugar, top it off with a glaze. YOU DO YOU.

5. And, yes. Homemade fruitcakes don't taste anything like the boxed version you've been re-gifting for seven generations.

6. It's fruitcake's world and we're just living in it.

7. Johnny Depp looks good saying it.

So, tell us. Do you like fruitcake?