Skip To Content

    30 Things You Learn About Love By The Time You're 30

    It gets worse, guys. (And also so much better.)

    1. You need to start with yourself.

    Logo / Via wordpress.com

    Know yourself. Appreciate your gifts and understand and accept the flaws you cannot change. Work on the ones you can. Be the best version of you before seeking the best version of someone else.

    2. Hearts are broken, but not destroyed.

    20th Century Fox / Via tumblr.com

    If you put yourself out there, you will, inevitably, at some point or another, have your heart broken. It will hurt. You will grieve and you will become angry and your pride will take a beating. But some day, both slowly and seemingly all of a sudden, the pain will stop, and you will love and be loved again.

    3. You cannot make someone love you.

    Fox Searchlight Pictures / Via media.giphy.com

    Again: You cannot make someone love you.

    4. Love can be sneaky.

    Paramount Pictures / Via tumblr.com

    Someone you'd never considered will one day, unexpectedly, cause your heart to bloom.

    5. There is no such thing as "The One."

    Universal Pictures / Via collegetimes.com

    You may indeed find the one person who is willing and able to grow with and alongside you through the years, through challenges and joys and losses and quiet. Or you may not. You may, instead, find many "Ones" to love and be loved by. Don't sweat it.

    6. Sometimes love doesn't feel like strong enough of a word.

    United Artists / Via blogger.com

    You'd be surprised at how quickly love grows into luff. With two f's.

    7. Love is work, and it is hard.

    NBC / Via cfile9.uf.tistory.com

    Give the people you love your time and your effort, even during the bad times. Don't be afraid of the struggle. Sometimes you need to know when to stay and fight.

    8. Love will not solve relationship problems.

    Fox Searchlight Pictures / Via doctornerdlove.com

    You need more than love to pull through tough times. You're going to need to cultivate patience, empathy, and the ability to know when to concede. And, sometimes, things become broken beyond repair, despite your best intentions. Don't attempt to put a salve on a broken limb -- move on.

    9. There are many kinds of love.

    NBC / Via wordpress.com

    Open yourself up to the different ways love will find you. It might not always be in the ways you expected or planned for.

    10. Love looks different to different people.

    NBC / Via wordpress.com

    Other people's relationships might seem strange or mismatched to you, but that's fine. It's not for you to get.

    11. Love can make the whole world sing...

    20th Century Fox / Via images5.fanpop.com

    Even if it's really just you singing in the shower.

    12. ...And often speaks in a whisper.

    ABC Family / Via hellyeahstefandlena.tumblr.com

    Or with no words at all.

    13. Love will surprise you.

    Buena Vista Pictures / Via tumblr.com

    Don't close yourself off or harden your heart to possibilities. Doing so won't protect you from being hurt and will only shut you off from someone different and new.

    14. Love will make you better.

    Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures / Via tumblr.com

    15. ...And sometimes brings out your worst.

    Samuel Goldwyn Company / MGM / Via tumblr.com

    Fight it.

    16. Love is neutral, and as bad or good as you make it.

    20th Century Fox / Via okmoviequotes.com

    A cake is only as good as the ingredients you use to make it, right?

    17. And do not confuse being distracted with being in love.

    Embassy Pictures / Via blogger.com

    Love is not a placeholder for emptiness.

    18. And know that, the louder the performance, the quieter things are backstage.

    ABC News / Via tumblr.com

    You don't need big declarations and demonstrations when you both know you have the real thing.

    19. Love is comfy.

    ABC / Via cupon.es

    Like a shoe that's worn in just right (and has seen you eat an entire pizza in your pajamas while you're fighting off a cold).

    20. But do not mistake comfort for love.

    20th Century Fox / Via tumblr.com

    A routine feels safe, but don't let it take the place of real joy.

    21. And do not mistake attention for love.

    Fine Line Features / New Line Cinema / Via data1.whicdn.com

    Some people just love the idea of love. Whether you are there, or someone else is. Don't be a minor character in someone else's play.

    22. No one owes you love.

    Focus Features / Via media.giphy.com

    Allow it to be given freely and with enthusiasm.

    23. Love does not keep score.

    Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer / Via pop.genius.com

    Relationships aren't a tally of times you were wronged or slighted. Forgive. It keeps your heart healthy.

    24. Love means constantly saying you're sorry.

    Paramount Pictures / Via images5.fanpop.com

    (And meaning it.)

    25. Love will change you.

    CBS / Via tumblr.com

    26. And sometimes disappoint you.

    20th Century Fox / Via filmonic.com

    But you can and will get over it.

    27. Love is beautiful.

    Fox / Via tumblr.com

    28. And frightening.

    Sony Pictures Classics / Via tumblr.com

    There will be pain and hurt and illness. There will be scary moments, and downright ugly times. This is what you sign up for. This is a part of it.

    29. Love won't give up on you.

    New Line Cinema / Via tumblr.com

    30. ...So don't give up on it.

    New Line Cinema / Via tumblr.com

    BuzzFeed Daily

    Keep up with the latest daily buzz with the BuzzFeed Daily newsletter!

    Newsletter signup form