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19 Things That Happen When You Date A Smoker

Sometimes we love people despite their habits.

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1. You have to think about what you're going to wear around them because it will have to go straight into the laundry.

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Never washing your jeans is fine (nobody washes their jeans) but once they smell like smoke, it's all over. #laundryfordays.

2. Your hair-washing schedule gets totally messed up.

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Pantene with essence of Camel.

3. You watch in awe as they perform expert tricks with their lighter.

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Yes, I would like you to open my bottle for me!

4. You get to know their scent as a mix between their body spray and cigarette smoke.

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Gucci + smoke = weirdly OK scent.

5. You learn to know the facial expression that means they are jonesin' for a ciggie from a mile away.

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6. You wish they put as much planning into dates with you as they do into their cigarette breaks.

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7. They disappear to go smoke so swiftly that you find you are talking to yourself for several minutes before realizing.

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OK, I'll just wait for you to get back.

8. You get smoker's breath even though your mouth went nowhere near an actual cigarette.

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9. You can't tell if they are also a pyro, or just love using their lighter.

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Fire is kind of ~cool~ though.

10. Your car rides with them are always windswept and frigid.

11. You often wait patiently for them to finish a cigarette just so you can go in for a kiss, or hold their hand.

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Maybe it's unintentional, but it always seems like their smoking hand is whichever side you're on!

12. You feel like you are constantly surrounded by gray ashes and they're somehow all over you.

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13. You are always explaining at parties where your date is.

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"Outside smoking, again?!"

"Mmmmhhmmm."

14. You are always waving a cloud of smoke away from your face.

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Oh, don't mind my nose and mouth, they didn't mean to be in the way of your exhale.

15. You are fluent in cigarette-in-their-mouth-while-they-talk language.

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"Fdjslnkaov dnskh ds dfhu?"

"Yeah, I'm making chicken for dinner."

16. You have watched them experience a sudden fit of coughing — while you're making out with them.

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Thanks for that.

17. You know that mentioning quitting is normally off-topic, unless you want to be either yelled at or completely ignored for the rest of the day.

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Don't play with fire. Like. Literally.

18. You hate that you're entertained by their party tricks.

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Damn, why is that so cool?

19. You feel like you can chew less gum out of fear that your breath isn't the freshest, because you know it is almost always fresher than your partner's breath.

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Put that breath spray away, friend. You have a free pass today.

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