Updated: 27 October, 15:05 p.m. GMT: Here is a new addition: a carton of Buttermilk in Tesco in Ireland.
Item one: this Milkybar. It has an illustration of a horse's head on it. Unless your name is Robin Jacobs, 31, of South Woodford in London.
This week he is quoted as saying: "It was a little bit surprising, I don't think I've ever seen anything like it before, that's for sure. What on earth is a penis doing on a children's chocolate bar? There's no point denying what it looks like. It is obvious – we can all see it. It's a completely inappropriate picture. The penis in question is even bigger than the child – surely the people making the bar can see what it looks like."
Nestlé has apologised for any "confusion or embarrassment" this may have caused.
Item two: this baby grow from Next.
Item 3: this margarine. Although in this case there's not so much outrage.
Item 4: this cloud.
Penises. They're everywhere you look in this country. Even in our roads. Look at George Road, Edward Road, and Yeoman Cottages in Hoylake, Wirral.
Look at Bellenden Gardens in Edinburgh, which is honestly called Bellenden Gardens.
What's happening? Why does everything look like a penis all of a sudden?
A cashew nut.A penis.
It's a cashew nut.
A dog.A penis.
It's a dog.
It's a dog again.A penis.
It's another dog.
A penis.Someone's arm.
Someone's arm. Thank god.
A penis.A saddle.
It's a saddle.
Some scissors.A penis.
It's some scissors.
Britain Keeps Seeing Penises Everywhere At The Moment, But Why?
Everyone's losing their mind and seeing wangs left right and centre, but not me.
I don't know how to put this, but I kind of see dicks in a lot of places.
Penises. Penises. All I see is penises.