15 Fashion Tips From Days Of Yore

Learn everything you ever wanted to know about dressing yourself from the British Library’s dusty tomes.

1. One sleeve is better than two.

Need a sling? LIFE HACK.

2. If your hair is pointy enough, you will look much larger than your surroundings.

The ultimate goal of fashion.

3. Chicks dig sticks.

Also: witch hats, muttonchops, disaffected stares.

4. Use a spindle to coyly flirt.

Spinners gon’ spin.

5. Or just use your butt.

6. Cram a bunch of flowers in your hair for a quick and easy style update.

Dat ankle.

7. Layers, layers, layers!

8. Your guitar is naked. Give it a tassel.

9. Hair should be ropelike or not at all.

12. The buddy system is useful for field trips and also for hats.

13. (Although really, is a hat a hat unless it looks like a menacing raven perched on the top of your head, muttering ill fortunes into your ear until you go mad with torment?)

14. A good way to get a man is if he is very tiny and lives among the folds of your skirt.

15. Never be afraid to flaunt some cleave.

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