13 Emmys We Should Really Give "Jessica Jones"

Most of these don't exist, but they should.

Posted on July 04, 2016, 12:01 GMT

1. Outstanding Reminder of How Complex and Interesting Superhero Stories Can Be

2. Outstanding Portrayal of a Living, Breathing Female Friendship

3. Outstanding Portrayal of Trauma That Did More Than Feel Like Another Retread

4. Outstanding Use of a Villain Far Too Many People Can Relate To

5. Outstanding Use of a Face

6. Outstanding Work Keeping Mike Colter in Our Lives and in Our Hearts at All Times

7. Outstandingly Hot Sex Scenes Between Outstandingly Hot People

8. Outstanding Employment of a Cheesy Catchphrase

9. Outstanding Supporting Actress Constructed out of Pure Toughened Sunshine

10. Outstanding Employment of a Leather Jacket

11. Outstanding Justification of All Those Years Spent Loving Krysten Ritter

12. Outstanding Adaptation of Beloved Comic Book Into Beloved TV Show

13. Outstanding Burn From a Show's Official Social Media Account

(Psst, Emmy voters: You should probably give them some real Emmys as well.)