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Can You Leave This Party Yet?

You know you've been there. But when can you leave?

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  1. Can you bounce?

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    You've said hello to the host (if you know them).
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    You've said hello to as many people you know as you reasonably and politely can.
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    You've attempted to make conversation with said people.
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    All attempts at conversations are boring the shit outta you.
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    You don't actually know anybody at this party.
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    The one person you know is talking to somebody else.
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    The person who's hosting doesn't have a pet you can distract yourself with.
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    The food spread is underwhelming.
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    The drink selection is just not doing it for you.
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    It's unlikely anyone would actually be mad at you if you slipped out.
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    The light has drained from your eyes.
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    You are staring into the distance dreaming of your bed.
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    You have some great leftovers waiting for you at home.
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    The level of shade your leaving would trigger is probably worth those leftovers.
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    The level of shade your leaving would trigger is probably worth your bed.
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    You've spent more time staring at your phone than interacting with your party surroundings.
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    You secretly hate the only person who's talking to you.
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    This party is making you question why these are your friends.
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    Someone is singing "Wonderwall" or threatening to.
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    They're out of guacoamole.
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    An ex is present and you're not on the best of terms.
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    You could conceivably fit in at least one episode of your favorite TV show before bed.
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    The internet is better than this place.
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    You'd rather not be wearing pants right now.
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    You're not drunk enough for this shit.
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