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This Is How 13 Rom-Coms Would End If They Had Real Friends In Them

Because hopeless romantics are truly hopeless without a good, sensible best friend by their side.

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1. Say Anything

Gracie Films

Hollywood would have you believe that Lloyd Dobler standing outside of a girl's window blaring love songs is romantic. A good best friend would have called this shit out for what it is: disturbing the peace and felony stalking.

2. Clueless

Paramount Pictures

Dionne and Ty were good friends on the surface, but their failure to tell Cher that just 'cause falling for your stepbrother is legal, it doesn't make it right shows their true natures. A good friend would have given Cher the "I love you but you're nasty" talk before things escalated.

3. She's All That


Oh, the classic tale of a truly stunning girl who is apparently gruesomely disfigured by eyeglasses, ponytails, and overalls. "LANEY BOGGS WHO CAME FROM A BOG!" they seemed to shout, but didn't actually. Laney Boggs relied on her dad for advice (big mistake) instead of a bestie. One good gal pal to say, "Laney, astigmatism is correctable and fashion crimes are not actually illegal. We can do this without King Freddie of High School" or whatever his name is would have fixed everything. She wouldn't have gone to the dance where Usher DJ'ed, but she also wouldn't have been attacked by Matthew Lillard.


4. You've Got Mail

Warner Bros Entertainment

Though the danger and stigma of online dating have largely disappeared in our hyperconnected world, going out with a stranger from the World Wide Web in 1998 was a death wish. No GPS tracking your phone. No texting your friend how it went. No PULSE by the end of the night. If there had been a good best friend present, she would have insisted on trailing the couple and later informed her that Tom Hanks' character was a regular old cad.

6. The Birdcage

Nichols Film Company

"So I think I'm going to have my dad's loving male partner dress up as an old lady to appease the bigoted straight parents of my teenage bride. Sound good?" is not some shit that a good friend would tolerate from their best friend, no matter how sincere his intentions with his betrothed are. You just don't make your family compromise who they are to make others comfortable. A stand-up best friend would slap some sense into the young fellow and say, "And also, what's the long-term plan here, chucklehead?" and he'd be so on point.

7. How To Lose a Guy in Ten Days

Paramount Pictures

To be honest, Kate Hudson's character doesn't deserve a good best friend in the beginning when she decides to use her friend's heartbreak as the catalyst for her own article on driving men away with TYPICAL GIRL MISTAKES. But just as she's eating bon-bons during her stories and smearing period blood everywhere, she starts to fall in love. Her editor, a brutal feminine void of journalistic ethics, insists that she continue the assignment. It is then that a good best friend would call up the New York attorney general to report a hostile work environment and get her back to her sweet, sweet love.


8. 50 First Dates

Happy Madison Productions

Drew Barrymore suffers from tragic short-term memory loss in this romantic dystopia where Adam Sandler is considered a catch of some kind. If homegirl had a friend to intervene and be like, "Yo, stop taking my girl out on all these fuckin' first dates," it would have saved everyone a lot of heartbreak.

9. Bridget Jones's Diary

Universal Studios

Forget those smarmy, dashing lovers — Bridget Jones has a serious issue with body dysmorphia that a best friend would toughly but fairly insist she address before engaging with these dudes.

10. The Proposal

Mandeville Films

Sandra Bullock was doing great in this movie and didn't need any bitch to help her out. Ryan Reynolds' character, on the other hand, had someone play a mean trick on him that made him believe that personal assistants get promoted to editors. A good buddy to be like, "Psst, you gotta be an editorial assistant for that job, bro" would have saved everyone the headaches of mismatched love.

11. Sex and the City

HBO Films

Miranda, Samantha, and Charlotte should have burned down City Hall before they let Carrie marry that commitment-phobic, altar-skippin', no-good-dirty Mr. Big. It is so abundantly clear that they actually hate her that they let that happen. She needed a real friend, not a gang of marriage-hungry harpies that forgive unacceptable behavior in libraries.


12. Knocked Up

Apatow Productions

"Keeping this albatross of a giant baby man in your life while you attempt to navigate your first pregnancy and dramatic work shifts is a great idea," said no best friend ever. A best friend would tell her to drop that dummy or drive her to the local Planned Parenthood.

13. Notting Hill

Caravan Pictures

The thing that Hugh Grant needed in this flick was not some hooey about a girl standing in a front of a boy asking him to love her. What he needed was a best mate to be like, "Mate, that is a grade-A bitch and a half standing in front of your doddering ass and making outrageous demands all the time. Run, you fool!"

Kevin Pollak played the father in "She's All That." An earlier version of this post misstated that he was played by Randy Quaid.

The character in "Say Anything" was named "Lloyd Dobler." An earlier version of this post misstated his name.

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