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Banana Flavoring Was Clearly Created In Hell

The war on real bananas, and on decency, rages on.

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Bananas are the smiles of the fruit world, bringing joy to all in their path.

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As a nutrient-dense and delicious fruit that brings joy and potassium to untold numbers of people every day, they should have a great life.

Bananas were an easy target because they are easy to chemically mimic and the Satanists could build their beast undetected.

Alexei Nastoiascii / Getty Images

Last year, synthetic organic chemist Derek Lowe, told the BBC, "The thing is, banana can be mimicked most of the way with a simple compound called isoamyl acetate. Many chemists know it as 'banana ester' and anyone who smells it immediately goes, 'banana!'" This is how the montrosity of banana flavoring gets away with its demonic work.

And so a most disgusting and vile flavor was born in the depths of Satan's kingdom.

These ghoulish creatures start every day with a mouth full of banana, turning their mortal mouths into miniature Gates of Hell.

Via amazon.com

The seller even brags about it being "Rich in Xylitol." Xylitol is the darling of the artificial sweetening world but is actually surrounded by controversy and deception.

S'mores are a widely known as gift from Heaven. But they can quickly turn demonic if the pilllowy, sweet real marshmallow is replaced by a banana one.

McCormick's / Via amazon.com

Banana marshmallow: the first choice of masochists and Lucifer's followers.

Banana jelly beans? More like banana HELL-y beans.

Jelly Belly / Via jellybelly.com

If it was between giving someone a bag of all-banana jelly beans and putting spiders in their mouth at night, the more sinister force of evil would do the jelly beans.

These banana candies are called "sassy spheres" but their real description ought to be "occult orbs."

The Nutty Fruit House / Via amazon.com

Keera's party guests were either Hell gods themselves or under a most unsavory witch's spell.

This is the candy supply of every house in Hell on Halloween night.

Via amazon.com

The "joke on every wrapper" is always a question joke but there are no answers on the back because life is pain when you sign the book of Beelzebub.

Fact: The Prince of Darkness' drink of choice after devouring banana candy is this puree mixed with goat's blood.

Via webstaurantstore.com

The "Finest Call" brand is a reference to the wisdom of God when he made the call to cast Satan from Heaven into the Lake of Fire.

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