Banana Flavoring Was Clearly Created In Hell
The war on real bananas, and on decency, rages on.
Bananas are the smiles of the fruit world, bringing joy to all in their path.
But as with all forces of good, there are forces of evil that wish to destroy it.
That is how the menace and scoundrel that is artificial banana flavoring came into our lives: to replace what is good with what is evil.
Bananas were an easy target because they are easy to chemically mimic and the Satanists could build their beast undetected.
And so a most disgusting and vile flavor was born in the depths of Satan's kingdom.
Some members of Satan's Army on Reddit profess their love for banana fluoride with impunity.
These ghoulish creatures start every day with a mouth full of banana, turning their mortal mouths into miniature Gates of Hell.
Speaking of deception, this banana cream chewing gum calls itself "Yum Yum Gum" to lure impressionable people into this cult of death.
S'mores are a widely known as gift from Heaven. But they can quickly turn demonic if the pilllowy, sweet real marshmallow is replaced by a banana one.
No party in the bowels of Hades is complete without these devilish delicacies.
Banana jelly beans? More like banana HELL-y beans.
These banana candies are called "sassy spheres" but their real description ought to be "occult orbs."
This is the candy supply of every house in Hell on Halloween night.
Fact: The Prince of Darkness' drink of choice after devouring banana candy is this puree mixed with goat's blood.
They've forced real bananas to undergo experiments by mad scientists to learn how to make increasingly more grotesque variations of the flavoring.
Some bananas have attempted suicide because of the shame brought by their association with these scoundrels of the night.
Others have joined the witness protection program and are now living as other foods.
Will these forces of Evil ever learn to join up with the forces of Good and end the banana war for good?
The world may never know.
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