1. You decide to pick up a hitchhiker.
2. Look around you. Are there hill people?
3. Every building in a 20 mile radius looks like it may be the portal to hell.
4. You ignored my warnings about the hill people and one of them offers to call the sheriff
5. A big guy with a chainsaw bursts through a door at you
6. Your boyfriend's face ends up on someone else's face
If you value your face, then heed my warning, friends.