I Ranked 34 "Riverdale" Characters From "Should've Never Existed" To "Absolutely Saved The Show"

Yes, I did rank a couple of serial killers higher than Archie Andrews. It's just how I feel!

If you are or ever were a viewer of Riverdale, you definitely have some opinions about the characters. I have A LOT, so I decided to rank them from worst to best.

The CW

The Riverdale universe is enormous and there are too many damn characters, so I left out a couple smaller ones. Don't hate me!!!

34. Clifford Blossom

The CW

He murdered his OWN SON, and tbh, even before that was revealed, he just had the most awful vibes. Every time he was on screen, you could just tell he was a vile man.

33. Hiram Lodge

The CW

I hate this man with my whole being. He's relentless! Diabolical! Cruel! Not to mention, he's just reeaaaally annoying and his plots to ruin the town are getting old. Like, girl, it's Season 5. Either destroy Riverdale or find a new line of work. 🙄 Please!

32. Archie Andrews

The CW

I don't know where to begin. He's so...dumb. He's just constantly making the dumbest choices and doing the dumbest shit. He's also kinda boring. The man has, like, no personality. It seems like he's always on autopilot. He just goes with the flow and with his impulses. He's often in so many back-to-back relationships that I can't even tell if he actually likes the women he dates or if he's just killing time. But he's completely selfless and loyal, though, so there's that. 

31. Hal Cooper

The CW

He's a literal serial killer and tried to kill his own kid. Need I say more?

30. Edgar Evernever

The CW

Edgar was another menace to society. He was the leader of a cult that HARVESTED ORGANS. He's only ranked a little higher than the two prior murderers because he was wackier and kinda entertaining to watch. Also, he's hot.

29. Chic

The CW

This man is a sociopath and a murderer and also the Gargoyle King. We do not stan Chic. 

28. Charles Smith

The CW

He seemed like a normal guy at first, but nope, he turned to be another serial killer too. BUT he said he only kills those who hurt the people he loves, which is why he's a liiiiiittle higher up than the other Riverdale serial killers. Then again, he did terrorize Betty, Alice, Dagwood, and Juniper on the twins' birthday...

27. Ethel Muggs

The CW

Ethel pops up on the show rarely, but every time she does, she's down bad. I didn't really have an issue with her till she became obsessed with the Gargoyle King. Once she did, she was insufferable. Kissing Jughead, giving Betty hell at the Sisters of Quiet Mercy, then bragging to her about kissing Jughead. (Also, she's just so cringe a lot of the time, idk.)

26. Penelope Blossom

The CW

She introduced Gryphons & Gargoyles to Riverdale, which killed off like a third of the town's population all because no one reached out to her after her son was murdered. PETTY AS HELL. But she's calmed down a lot since she was released from prison, and she's kinda funny now.

25. Hermione Lodge

The CW

I loved her at the start of the show, but once Hiram came back from jail, she took on a lot of his traits and helped in his devious plans. Also, no one ever talks about it, but SHE KILLED HER LOVER (Sheriff Minetta) and moved on like nothing happened. 

24. Polly Cooper

The CW

Polly kinda sucks. She judged Betty for being a bad daughter and sister because Betty "abandoned" the family (aka went to college), even though Polly herself has run away multiple times, given birth without telling her family, and left town with her twins again without telling her family. 

23. Kevin Keller

The CW

Kevin was alright for most of the series. Honestly, the only reason he's not ranked higher is because of how at the last minute he decided to abandon the unborn baby that HE wanted and left Toni and Fangs to raise it. Punk-ass move, Kevin.

22. Mr. Weatherbee

The CW

We don't know a lot about him except that he's a bad principal. Riverdale High is a mess. 

21. Tom Keller

The CW

Very nice man, fantastic dad, god-awful sheriff. 

20. Sierra McCoy

The CW

She put too much pressure on Josie, but she was an okay mayor, I guess. And she did do a lot to help Betty, Veronica, and Archie once she became a lawyer again. 

19. Mr. Honey

The CW

Yes, I know, he was a pain in the ass and too strict, but idk, he was right when he said that no one died at the school while he was principal. Riverdale High was a catastrophe, maybe they kinda needed him.

18. Sweet Pea

The CW

What a sweet, adorable, loyal guy. I wish we saw more of him!

17. Jason Blossom

The CW

Um, I put him smack dab in the middle to stay as neutral as possible, because I quite literally know nothing about this man. Never heard him speak or laugh. I don't know his hobbies or interests. At this point in the show, he's had more screen time as a corpse than when he was alive in flashbacks. 

16. Marmaduke "Moose" Mason

The CW

I also wish we saw more of him! He always seemed like a really nice guy, and he and Kevin were so cute. 

15. Nana Blossom

The CW

She irks me sometimes. Why is she always speaking in riddles? She's whimsical, though, and one of the few good Blossoms. 

14. Jughead Jones

The CW

Pros: He's intelligent and he's always saving the town from its latest nightmare. 

Cons: All his snide remarks, pretentious attitude, and selfish acts (i.e. the way he sold out his friends for a book) make him a little bit of an asshole.

13. Mary Andrews

The CW

One of the few good Riverdale parents!

12. Veronica Lodge

The CW

Riverdale's ultimate girl boss! She's savvy, unapologetic, well-dressed, and she's got killer eyebrows. My only gripe is that sometimes the things she says and the language she uses are peak cringe. 

11. Fangs

The CW

Oh Fangs, what a sweetheart. He's been a devoted friend, a doting boyfriend, and dedicated father. Keep doing you, Fangs!

10. Reggie Mantle

The CW

He's an ass, but in a more charming, funny way instead of the Jughead way, ya know? He's also very easy on the eyes. Extra points for his jawline and physique. Plus, he looks amazing in suits. Honestly, looks great in most things. Also, did I mention he's hot as hell?

9. Cheryl Blossom

The CW

She was right to call herself "Riverdale's resident it girl." She IS the moment. Cheryl has been through way too damn much, but she always bounces back...eventually (she needs to get professional help, tho). Yeah, she's sometimes quite selfish, but she's extremely generous when it counts. She's just hilarious, chaotic, and fabulous, what more could we ask for?

8. Josie McCoy

The CW

JOSIE DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER! Even in her brief time on the show, she gave us a break from the absurdity and proved that Riverdale's better storylines are the ones where it's just a normal teen drama. 

7. F.P. Jones

The CW

F.P. had some of of the best character development on this show. He did a lot of questionable things, but he's a good man at heart! The scene where he left town for good was heartbreaking. 

6. Tabitha Tate

The CW

She's been such an immense help to Jughead and Betty. I mean, she's literally put her life on the line for them and she hasn't known them nearly as long as all the other characters. Tabitha is an A+ friend. 

5. Toni Topaz

The CW

There is not one bad bone in this woman's body! Toni is probably the most genuine and reliable person on this list. 

4. Alice Cooper

The CW

I know, in the past she's been *a lot* and yes, she's done some messed-up things to Betty, but she's become one of the best developed and most complex characters on the show. 

3. Fred Andrews

The CW

Fred was THE best parent. He never had ulterior motives or bad intentions. He just cared about keeping his son safe and was always willing to give someone a hand. He was the most sincere person and one of the few characters who actually would act and react kinda rationally to things (at least for Riverdale).

2. Pop Tate

The CW

All he ever did was mind his business and make his burgers. I hope he's been enjoying retirement. 

1. Betty Cooper

The CW

I wonder if Betty sees a lot of chiropractors as a result of carrying this show on her BACK for so many years. She's an absolute badass and I'm just always rooting for her, no matter how painful her storyline may be. Very similar to Cheryl, she's been through waaaaaay too much. She's probably the smartest, bravest (yes, braver than Archiekins), and most resilient character. 

Who do you think should've been ranked higher or lower? Who else do you think should've been on the list? Let us know in the comments!