The Definitive Tourist's Guide To The World Of Super Mario Bros.
This guide will give you 1-Up on other travelers to the Mushroom Kingdom.
The cloudy idyll Mushroom Kingdom sings with songs of history, natural beauty, and quirky local culture.
You could spend many lives exploring the lush countryside of the Kingdom, so be smart, and follow our simple guidelines and recommendations.
Make ample use of the kitschy warp pipes and stars Harvard deemed an "indigenous masterpiece of public transportation."
Plan according to the political climate, as the region is plagued by a civil war between the ruling party's elite mercenaries and the violent Koopa underclass.
Take advantage of the drug-positive culture and sample all of the local mind-altering delicacies.
Feel free to hunt, flambé, or stomp out the flora and fauna that populate the countryside, as there are no laws protecting native species.
Do not be frightened by the various native groups; ethnicities like the Pianta are friendly and offer great prices on gold.
They are a kind, gentle folk who like to dance. Consider taking home their exotic dress as a present for your grandmother; they make great bath towels.
Lastly, don't warp everywhere. The Kingdom has some very friendly indigenous creatures that provide access to niche spots unavailable by warp.
1. For the first-time visitor: Stroll or kart around majestic Peach's Castle.
2. Take a brisk, invigorating jog through the expansive countryside.
3. Embrace your inner snow bunny.
🍄 Toad's Tip 🍄 Be careful! That ground is slippery!
The Kingdom offers several icy-cool areas to chill out, including Cool Cool Mountain, Snowman's Land, and Freezeflame Galaxy (located a short warp star away in outer space). Enjoy sledding, ice skating, kidnapping baby penguins, and spelunking in the low-temp areas of the Kingdom.
4. Take a load off in the quaint resort town of Isle Delfino.
🍄 Toad's Tip 🍄 Tread lightly; the graffiti artists in Delfino are very dangerous.
Isle Delfino is perhaps the most idyllic locale in the surrounding areas of the Kingdom, with one major caveat: It is only accessible by elite chartered flights. Splash around in the intensely clear waters, admire the quaint architecture from street level, or soar to the top of the town center and admire the splendor of the Shine Gate.
5. For the more experienced traveler: Explore the ponderous depths of caverns and the underground.
6. Experience spiritual visions in the intense loneliness of the desert.
7. Cry from laughter or horror at kitschy Ghost Houses.
8. For the bravest of travelers: Admire the militaristic nobility of the Koopa Liberation Army's majestic forts, palaces, and airships.
🍄 Toad's Tip 🍄 If you do happen to meet Bowser, dress conservatively as not to excite the Koopa's patriarchal values.
If you are somehow able to acquire a pass from the Revolutionary Council, definitely make a trip out to the Koopa fortresses. The Koopas are expert brick layers and have legendary hospitality for their guests. However, gaining their trust is extremely difficult. Famous examples include Bowser's Castle, the Koopalings' Castle, and the Flying Airships.
9. Sweat out your worries in a hot magma spa.
🍄 Toad's Tip 🍄 The only way to fight fire is with fire.
Protective gear is a must-have when visiting the lava pits of the Kingdom, but so is a healthy, adventurous attitude! The lava is home to all sorts of mysterious creatures and natural formations. Try to catch a glimpse of the natural fireballs or make friends with a Blargg! Very risky for tourists, but oh so hot right now.