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Which Quote Should My Son Use For The Yearbook?

I still can't believe he's a senior :(

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My son, Webster, is a senior this year, and he has to choose a quote for the yearbook.

He's also on the yearbook committee, because I made him.
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He's also on the yearbook committee, because I made him.

He wanted to pick a quote from The Godfather, and I obviously said no, but I decided to find a quote for him instead.

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  1. Which of these quotes is best?

    I don't normally let Webster have candy, so I was hesitant about the Eminem quote, but I thought it would be OK.

    Correct
    Incorrect
    "Boredom is the legitimate kingdom of the philanthropic.” -Virginia Woolf
    Correct
    Incorrect
    "I'm stupid, I'm ugly, I'm dumb, I smell. Did I mention I'm stupid?” -Eminem
    Correct
    Incorrect
    "We'd always have in our hearts, the comforts of that evening, the love of our families and the everlasting nature of true friendship.” -Felicity Merriman, Felicity: An American Girl Adventure
    Correct
    Incorrect
    “Don’t talk to me before I’ve had my coffee, or ever.” -a someecards I found online that I thought was really funny
    Correct
    Incorrect
    "Whanne that April with his shoures sote The droughte of March hath perced to the rote.” -Geoffrey Chaucer
    Correct
    Incorrect
    “After I graduate, I’m going to go to the community college two miles away and live at home with my wonderful mother. I'm so grateful to have such a good mom. This is Webster, by the way.” -Webster, my son
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Which of these quotes is best?
  1.  
    vote votes
    "Boredom is the legitimate kingdom of the philanthropic.” -Virginia Woolf
  2.  
    vote votes
    "I'm stupid, I'm ugly, I'm dumb, I smell. Did I mention I'm stupid?” -Eminem
  3.  
    vote votes
    "We'd always have in our hearts, the comforts of that evening, the love of our families and the everlasting nature of true friendship.” -Felicity Merriman, Felicity: An American Girl Adventure
  4.  
    vote votes
    “Don’t talk to me before I’ve had my coffee, or ever.” -a someecards I found online that I thought was really funny
  5.  
    vote votes
    "Whanne that April with his shoures sote The droughte of March hath perced to the rote.” -Geoffrey Chaucer
  6.  
    vote votes
    “After I graduate, I’m going to go to the community college two miles away and live at home with my wonderful mother. I'm so grateful to have such a good mom. This is Webster, by the way.” -Webster, my son

Thanks!!

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