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5 Signs Someone's On ADDerall/ Vyvanse/"Limitless Pills"

Let's face it Generation-Y, we've all indulged ourselves in the "little helpers" called Adderall at some point along our growing-up journey. Whether it be to stay up for all of Grad Night (because the two breathalyzers on the way in eliminated your chances of drinking) with your entire Graduating class, all of you happy and confusing as shit to the supervision who watched you all doze through four years of High School and suddenly wake up for this all-nighter, to get you through midterms from every fine institution from Yale to Brigham Young University to community college, or, to quote my fifteen year old little brother who just had his first experience and called to tell me about it: "Just to try it." Don't get me wrong, I sometimes see the pro's of this stuff, but for people who actually have ADD or ADHD, which contrary to popular belief is not EVERYONE, thus the cracked-out teens and young adults we see running rampant through society. Its no wonder this stuff was once taken off the pharmeceutical market after the side effects of Obetrol (the first name of Adderall) were discovered to be far worse than the positive side of it (weight loss) before the year 2000. See for yourselves...

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2. TALKING: voice faster than the speed of sound and often too low to hear without Super-Human powers

Via Twitter: @AdderalIHadMe

If you and a friend take it together, there is a possibility the two of you will all of the sudden vibe on the same frequencies and become wizard-minded geniuses with 100 new ideas a minute ready to pour into your already rather pointless conversation.

3. OCD


Even the dirtiest of scumbags will find the need to vacuum his/her floor (after re-organizing and cleaning their room) about three times a day with a little kick in the ass from an orange,bliss-ball-filled capsule.

4. HOPE: everything is suddenly possible

"I Believe I Can Fly" would accurately describe the theme song seemingly playing in the ears of one on Adderall. (Similar to the euphoric effects of meth, or on the "up" of bipolar disorder.)

5. MOVEMENT: it's a constant thing.


Even though sweat is the prominent feature radiating from this human, the need for MORE MORE MORE moving definitely overwhelms the self-conciousness of excess body fluids. Plus, its not like you're going to be touching anyone.... even though you might think you want to... you don't.

Why am I writing this? Because at 21, I wish someone would have warned me that taking this stuff is not only addictive, and eventually something you get used to, but it literally has taken "ice cream scoops out of [my] brain," to quote Weeds. I first took some from a friend to write my research paper which determined my English grade for my entire class Junior Year, and later got prescribed myself (adderall, then vyvanse.) Six years later, I sit for several minutes, even writing for fun, trying to think of the correct word or phrase to fit into my sentence, and 50 percent of the time I cannot. I am not saying it doesn't help with my very low attention span, but I was laughing with my best friend as we discussed the negative effects, and figured we could all use a little laugh at ourselves.

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