Herman Cain Suspends Presidential Campaign, Invokes Pokemon Theme

Cain made an announcement in Atlanta Saturday afternoon that he is bowing out of the 2012 GOP race. Though he still promises to “be making an endorsement in the near future” and will now presumably go back to watching cartoons.

“I chose to run for president because the politicians in Washington D.C. wouldn’t do their jobs … I had never held public office before, and I didn’t have a pajillion dollars … I am proof that a common man could lead this nation, because I consider myself one of you. But because of these false and unproved accusations, it has had a tremendous painful price on my family … That being said, I am suspending my presidential campaign because of the continued distraction.”

“But let me leave you with this. I believe these words came from the ‘Pokemon’ movie. ‘Life can be a challenge. Life can seem impossible. It’s never easy when there’s so much on the line. But you and I can make a difference. There’s a mission just for you and me. Just look inside, and you will find just what you can do.’”

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