2Truthy
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Dave Letterman's Love Shack
Dave's Love Shack by -2Truthy If you see a faded sign at the side of the road that says Right this way to Dave's... Love Shack! Love Shack yeah yeah I'm headin' to 53rd and Broadway, lookin' for hot Dave's love getaway Heading for the love getaway, love getaway I got me a ransom note for Dave getting' tail and now I'm heading' to jail For the Love Shack I demanded a check for around $2 million So hurry up and pay so I can make a killing Oh The Love Shack is a little old place where Dave can shag his interns Love Shack baby, {a Love Shack bay-bee}. Love shack, baby love shack, love shack, baby love shack, love shack. {love baby, that's where it's at) love shack {love baby, that's where it's at) Sign says.. Woo... stay away fools, 'cause love rules at Dave's Love Shack! Well it's set on top of Ed Sullivan's Theatre Just a swanky hot shack where he won't be goin' back Glitter on the mattress Glitter down on Broadway Sleepin' on the front porch Dave is in the doghouse... The Love Shack is a little old place where Dave can shag his interns love shack baby... {Love Shack baby!} Love Shack, that's where it's at! Love Shack, that's where it's at! Huggin' and a kissin', dancin' and a lovin', wearin' next to nothing Cause Dave's hot as an oven The whole shack shimmies YEA! the whole shack shimmies! The whole shack shimmies with seven interns Movin' around and around and around! Everybody's movin', everybody's groovin' baby! Folks linin' up outside just to get down Everybody's movin', everybody's groovin' baby! Funky little shack! Funky little shack! I got me a ransom note for Dave getting tail and now I'm heading' to jail! Oh Dave's Loves Shack it sleeps about seven Where he nails some tail and goes to heaven! Oh the Love Shack is a little old place where Dave can shag his interns love shack, baby! {a love shack baby} love shack! baby love shack love shack! baby love shack love shack! baby love shack {love baby that's where its at, yea, love baby that's where it's at} Bang bang bang, on the door baby! {Knock a little louder, baby} Bang bang bang,on the door baby! {I can't hear you} Bang bang bang, on the door baby! {Knock a little louder sugar!} Bang bang bang, on the door baby! {It's Regina!!!} Bang bang {on the door baby} Bang bang {on the door} Bang bang {on the door baby} Bang bang Your what?.... Dave you're busted!!!!!!!!!!!!! Love Shack, baby Love Shack! Love Shack, baby Love Shack! love baby that's where its at, yea, love baby that's where it's at} Love Shack, baby Love Shack! Love baby, love shack Huggin' and a kissin', dancin' and a lovin' at the love shack. Your pal, -2Truthy
Obama Police Brutality: KeggerGate
Staggering News WASHINGTON (Coors Light) - Members of the Senate Judiciary Committee and Congress were up late last night debating whether the president made a huge mistake by inviting Harvard scholar Henry Louis Gates, and police officer Sgt. James Crowley over to the White House “for a beer” after saying that the Cambridge police “acted stupidly”. (Stereotype alert: Since Sgt. Crowley is a white, blue collar dude, the president wisely made sure not to invite him over for a glass of Cristal.) Losing the war on racial controversy is underway, as “Skip” Gates and Officer Sgt. Crowley should be headed to the White House soon for a beer and plenty of humor with the president in an attempt to defuse tensions. The racially charged arrest incident, in the words of David Axelrod, “developed a life of its own” after Obama “stupidly” commented about Sgt. Crowley being called to the Harvard professor's home to check out a suspected burglary.
Obama Smokes, Bums Cigarettes! "BUMbama"!!!
If I had one inspirational thought to sincerely convey to President Obama, it would be this: “Is that why your lips are purple? Stimulant junkies CAN get over themselves! Yes they can! Learn to substitute POSITIVE habits in place of that ratty nicotine. Grab a latte. If you must smoke something, I'll introduce you to my medicinal marijuana friends – even the nastiest ditchweed is one helluva lot better than a dreadful Lucky Strike, or so I have heard...Move around more. Get into the gym with Michelle FREQUENTLY and start doing a few extra laps on the treadmill, leg-lifts or whatever. Order the Suzanne Somers BUTTMASTER – not that you need it. Take up ball room dancing or, better yet, call up WOZ and get a slot on Dancing With the Stars (don't worry, Rahm will be happy to run everything in your absence.) Walk the damn dog nine times a day. Do it for your family who loves and needs you. Do it for your country, man. Do it for the South Side kids who worship (literally, as you know) and adore you. Do it for the mother fuc^%ng world! Be the poster boy of Change We Can't Afford to Blow on Smoke. Speaking of blow – you might try abstaining from that, also. Tough habits are only as tough as their masters, so don't be the Wimp in Chief. Be the Anti-stimulant. Sure, at first you'll say “Damn, this is all so horribly boring I'd rather waterboard my own self 24/7 or and take an ice-pick to my head than live like this” but over time, that all goes away as a new-found peace inhabits your smoke-free, inner world. And even though you will initially be convinced you've died and gone straight to Hell, that too, will pass. Trust me. Now go tweet Kal and have him personally remove all the ashtrays stashed under the Oval Office desk and on AF One. Do it...Less is the new More. Stop sacrificing your lungs for bleeping Big Tobacco!”
LARRY CRAIG LOSES LEGAL SCANDAL IN GAY SEX APPEAL
A Larry Craig Bathroom Refresher Senate Seat or Toilet Seat I cannot decide I am not gay Oh no, no way.
Wall Street Bailout Bill Blows!
This Blows (sung to the tune of "The Rose") see link by Quincy Some say (neo) cons are like a letter That comes from Nigeria Some say cons promise shares of fortunes That bankers claim comes from China Some say cons will make us hungry An endless aching need I say cons are like a pig-in-a-poke Who eat the whole bag of feed It’s the bank afraid of breaking That’s never learned to ask Why a Ponzi scheme as grand as this one Could fall so bloody fast It’s the cons who won’t be hauled off To Rikers Island soon And the scammers selling bogus financial instruments Like lots of rocks-on-the moon. When the news is full of baloney That you have to turn the tee-vee off And you think that cons are only A bunch of big jack-offs Just remember in November beneath the bitter snows Lies a President Who is connected To Wall Street And hey, this blows.