First off, there’s no such thing as one type of Latina.
Let’s just get that straight. K thx.
1. People will say, “I bet your Quinceañera was a transformative experience for you.”
“I never had a Quinceañera, so… yeah.”
2. People have said, “So, you know how to salsa dance, right?”
No. Dancing is not a birthright.
3. You’ve been made fun of because you are “whitewashed.”
Even though they will follow it up by saying you look “exotic.”
4. People ask you why your skin isn’t darker, or why your hair isn’t dark.
Diversity, people. It’s a thing.
5. Proper social etiquette is a challenge: cheek kiss, hug, or handshake?
I’ll just stand here …
6. Everyone assumes you to be man-hungry and ready to marry.
BUT, like, stereotypes, man.
7. People expect you to be an expert on Pitbull.
DALE. Like, really, DALE that way.
8. People have been shocked to discover you’re not like Sofia Vergara.
She’s awesome, but take a seat with your stereotypes.
9. People get legitimately upset when you say you don’t like spicy food.
10. People who have spoken to you on the phone are always surprised when they meet you in person.
“Oh, you’re a Latina! Lol.”
11. Perfect strangers will say you are not a real Latina if you don’t speak in Spanish to them.
12. People can’t believe you are anything other than Catholic.
Pope Francis doesn’t actually care if everyone is Catholic.
13. People will walk up to you talking in Spanish and are shocked you don’t have an accent.
“Where did you learn to speak English so well?”
14. People expect you to know all the words to every J.Lo song.
Believe it or not, the world will keep on turning.
15. People can’t believe you aren’t an incredible cook because you are supposed to be.
“I can press the button on the microwave really well though.”
16. Everyone expects you to be really into soccer because it’s supposed to be in your blood.
“So, you kick it, right?”
17. People can’t believe you don’t have a hot temper because they expect you to turn over tables.
Because all Latina women throw over tables.
18. Everyone asks you what dish they should try when they go out to a Mexican/Peruvian/Colombian restaurant.
“Whatever you want?”