What's killing me is that one of the kids was obviously hungry as all hell- how many pizzas do you need to establish that drinking cuts into your “dining out” fund?

It looks like you could have a whole chihuahua, but can you only have the head of the rottweiler? And if you can have the whole rottweiler, then how long will you have both the rottweiler and the chihuahua before something…rather unfortunate happens?  Not underage drinking sounds like it's full of questions, scary, scarring possibilities, and just as many (or more) carbs than getting plastered every night. Plus I don't see any vijayjay on that poster, so I'll have to assume that you can't have that if you don't underage drink.

And you can have all those things PLUS alcohol if you do drink.

what? no kittens?