Playboy To Courtney Stodden: No Thanks

She may be 18 now but she’s still not what the publication has in mind.

Courtney Stodden turned 18 last week and was “bombarded by porn offers” — none of which were from Playboy — but she tweeted “No to porn… Yes to @Playboy” anyway. They didn’t take the bait:

Our sources say Stodden “doesn’t meet the standards of a Playboy model” … adding she looks too “enhanced.”

One source added, “[Playboy] would NEVER take her. I don’t think anybody really wants to see that anyway.”

Maybe it’s because they’ve already seen what she looks like as a bunny?

Via: tmz.com

New emails reveal Michael Jackson in a new light on the eve of what would have been his comeback tour: “locked in his room drunk and despondent” and “an emotionally paralyzed mess riddled with self loathing and doubt.”

Source: Getty / MICHAEL DALDER  /  via: newser.com

Michael Clarke Duncan had planned to wed Apprentice star Omarosa in January. Also the lack of oxygen during his July heart attack is said to be why he couldn’t ever fully recover.

Image by Alexander Tamargo / Getty Images

More drama in the divorce between Seal and Heidi Klum: Seal told the press that their relationship ended because Heidi was essentially screwing their bodyguard while they were still married:

Image by Christopher Polk / Getty Images

“I would have preferred that Heidi would have shown a little more class and at least wait until we separated first before deciding to fornicate with the help. I guess you all now have the answer that you’ve been waiting for for the past seven months.”

So then Heidi told Us Weekly:

“I cherish all of the great memories Seal and I created together over the years. Our separation was based on issues between the two of us,” Klum, 39, tells Us Weekly. “Seal has moved on and so have I. My priority has and continues to be protecting and providing for our children.”

John Stamos talked to Vulture about a Full House reunion:

Image by Jemal Countess / Getty Images

“I was flattering myself to think that James Franco might play me, and Steve Carell could do the Bob Saget role. The reunion had some movement, and then it was on hold. But I think if we’re going to do anything, we should do it while we’re all still looking okay. We should get together and do reunion for TV Land or something. I don’t know. It’s 25 years this September since it first started airing, and no matter what I do, that’s how people think of me. I’ve tried in the past to forget it and not be associated with it, but I’ve since learned to embrace it.”

Mo’Nique has FINALLY settled the lawsuit she was engaged in that was all about dog poop. Thank crap.

Image by Kevin Winter / Getty Images

Billy Joe Armstrong of Green Day just got out of the hospital and now his voice is gone!

Image by Andrew H. Walker / Getty Images

A new story claims that none other than Lindsay Lohan was on the Scientology-approved list of possible wives for Tom Cruise in 2004. Can you even imagine that??

Image by FRANCOIS GUILLOT / Getty Images

A post-surgery John Mayer “won’t talk for months.” Also, are we sure he’s not still dating Katy Perry?

Chad “Ochocinco” Johnson got Evelyn Lodaza’s face tattooed on his leg, as if that is going to help her forget the fact that he head-butted her.

Rashida Jones and Rob Lowe lit’rally spent their Labor Day listening to Steely Dan by the pool.

Did Beyonce give Kim Kardashian the cold shoulder over the weekend? Well it was B’s b-day, who could blame her?

William Shatner is being sued for harassing the help.

Michael Strahan officially took his place as Regis Philbin’s replacement on Live!

The Arrested Development movie has not been sold yet, so you should probably just keep thanking your lucky stars that we’re at least getting the show back.

Joey Buttafuoco is writing a tell-all book.

Kate Hudson supposedly worked out for six hours every day after she gave birth.

Puddle of Mudd’s Wes Scantlin was arrested after he got into an altercation with an airline attendant and then had to land early.

Nigel Barker has forgiven Tyra Banks for getting rid of him.

Bruce Willis is considering legal action against iTunes in order to protect the royalties from his music because he wants them to go to his three daughters.