So, post Election Night, an old high school friend who we’ll call Jenn (cause that’s her name) sent out a seemingly harmless Facebook rant:
“President Obama cares about me alright. He cares about how much money I make so he can take it from me to spend on the takers of this country.”
Which in a matter of minutes gained 7 likes and about 20 comments of criticism from her, so-called-soon-to-be-ex-communist friends. So, naturally, feeling attacked, the following day came what follows:
“Well you guys asked for it, so here goes…
First of all, I’m highly offended that you, Wes, [Woot!] think that I think that soldiers, children, and seniors are “takers”. Soldiers WORK everyday [as a former service-member I can attest to the absurdity of this statement] to keep this nation safe by putting their lives on the line for us, Second, seniors WORKED their whole lives and paid into programs like Social security and Medicare, and they EARNED every penny that they are now drawing on from those programs. Thirdly children aren’t paying taxes, so I don’t even know why they are being brought into my comment about President Obama planning to raise my taxes. [cause, Jenn, a huge reason to do so is to protect education and hire teachers, you half-wit] And since none of you know my tax bracket or earning levels, you don’t know what my taxes were last year or will be next year. [but, you’re about to hint about it later on, rich white girl!] All I know is that as a U.S. citizen I’m going to pay them every year. [Well, duh - tax evasion is a federal offense.]
Calling these people takers is just, well… it’s just stupid, come on guys. [even though you didn’t specify in the original post who said takers were, but let’s move on, shall we?]
I’m also shocked [!!!] that my sweet brilliant rocket scientist cousin, who has worked hard everyday in school her entire life to get good grades, to EARN her way through college through scholarships for higher education in the sciences and technology industry thinks that I think she that she is a taker. [again, you didn’t specify, still haven’t in fact. Also, is your cousin single?] ) I wasn’t so lucky, [wait, luck? I thought she earned it! Envy much, Jenn?] and worked three jobs throughout the school year and day and night in the summers to pay for my college education, as I know so many American’s [hehe, grammarfail] have also done. All so I could be come [sic] a self-sufficient productive member of society. For me, it was to serve my country as a civil servant, as President George H.W. Bush asked of me in his State of the Union addresses. [Wait, the first George Bush? You were like 8 years old, come on! Suspending disbelief is one thing, Jenn] I have worked to protect this country in the field of National Security [three letters: WMD] since I was 19 years old, and 2 other people who were offended my comment I know also do the same, I have no idea why they are offended either, you’re not takers to me either, and our country wouldn’t be as safe without the hard work you do everyday. [because obviously unless it is something that pertains to you directly, you shouldn’t be offended. Like, can I tell a black joke now, cause ya know, we’re all white here…right? Oh wait, I forgot, this whole thing is one big race bait. Hollerrrrr!]
To my uncle who was on food stamps, which of course I did not know, [cause, Jenn, people like you make people like him feel like shitty ashamed shitheads who can’t even feel comfortable enough with their shame to talk to family about it] I know how hard you worked to find work and even moved your family to other states far from family and friends to provide for your family, that’s why unemployment is there, and that is what food stamps were created for, to help Americans through tough times. NONE OF YOU ARE TAKERS In my opinion. [I’m really beginning to wonder who the takers are in this country, and where Obama found them. I mean, besides the ghetto, amiright? Jenn?] You are the hard working Americans that this country needs more of, I don’t want my cousin, sister, or any of the other dozens of young people that I know who are graduating from college this year to start their lives without a job or on unemployment, or suffer the pain of a layoff or a downsize. [or do you?! ] The sad reality is that half of you wont be able to find a job when you graduate, and that’s not a Romney or Republican statistic [finally, a Republican who admits they use their own special statistics!] that’s a fact that I can attest to from the friends and family who I know who have been suffering for the past four years to find work. [this is where one would normally go into either the partisan argument of the downturn being a result of failed Republican policies of the previous Administration, or the more economically factual argument about an evolving labor force in America thanks to globalization and the interconnected world which demands more spending in education and other programs to bring the force up to date with the latest trends in technology and manufacturing, but I digress - this isn’t about facts of intelligent conversation. This is about one Black President and one White Girl’s plight under his reign!]
I want it to be noted that I had as many people like my post as hate it… [take that haterz!] That’s how divided this nation is, [maybe next cycle, Reuters should just start polling Jenn’s friends?] that’s what this election showed us, [Uh, no, Obama won by like nearly 3% and only like 2 Republicans won in the Senate out of like 16 or 17 running, oh and Dems took state houses in a handful of states, and um… weed and gay marriage won, so meh] and that my friends is [ facepalm] part of the problem for both sides of the political spectrum. [clearly, however, Jenn’s hyperbolic ‘takers’ comment is not part of the problem. Priv much?]
I still challenge you all to tell me how President Obama cares about me, [this is where we start a change.org petition to get Obama to call Jenn, alright kids?] and what he plans to do to make my life better in the next four years. [it’s almost like she didn’t pay attention. Like she only watched FoxNews It’s also almost like it’s all about Jenn, which is kind of, well, sad.] I said “me”, [rich white girl] not all Americans, [poor black girls] “me” [rich white girl] . I know President Obama cares about some of the people in this country, [erhm, negros] I never said he didn’t. [don’t misquote her, lame-stream-facebook-friends-media] I said he only cares about my paycheck [cause it’s so huge!!!] because that’s how I feel. [and once again, we all know who elections are about: Jenn] And last time I checked, I was still entitled to my opinion in America. [because free speech doesn’t only mean anyone can say what they please, but specifically Jenn can say what she wants free from critique. Seriously it’s and amendment to the first amendment. A secret hidden amendment only Justice Ginsburg knows about.] Now I know some of you will want to quip back, “its not what the president is going to do for you”… yeah, I know, [wait, does she?] and I don’t need President Obama, other than to keep me safe, [hold her in your arms, you tall handsome negro!] that’s part my point. [there’s a point coming!?] I have worked hard my whole life, [unlike poor people] like so many of my friends and family, [white folk] to become a self-sufficient American citizen [take that, Mexican’ts!] that contributes to society rather than take from it. I never said I don’t want to pay taxes, [we know, we know] in fact I pay more in taxes than just about anyone I know, [BAM! See, told ya she’d tell us] and I never said I wanted to stop funding the things you have accused me of wanting to cut spending to, but that’s just how it’s going to have to be I guess. [yep]
Allison, you are welcome for paying for your education, [bout time someone said thanks] I hope Americans continue to fund the sciences through scholarships like yours. You’re about to be come a giver in about two months, [but right now, despite her not a few sentences ago stating otherwise, you are a huge mooch] and that’s how it’s supposed to work, you’re now set up to be a contributing member of our society for the rest of your life, so thank you. [just don’t like get hurt or lose your job, or anything irresponsible that poor people do. Then, she’ll have to start mocking you with her friends when they play tennis and she doesn’t want to have to do that to family] Sara, you need to thank the citizens of West Virginia for your education, I didn’t fund that one, [ sidebar: since when does West Virginia educate people?] and I hope you find work when you graduate, I truly do. [but you won’t cause of Ol’ B. Hussein.]
Perhaps my friends need to hear more of my opinions; [Yes, Please!] perhaps I should start using facebook to post more than just cute pictures of my baby. [Yes, GOD, Please!] So I call on my fellow conservatives out there to start getting fired up, [B*tch stole Barack’s Line!] and feel free to express how you feel. Conservatism isn’t a crime, [one can dream] and shame on you my fellow Americans for making me feel like that’s what you think of my beliefs. [Uh, cause for an entitled white girl, criticism feels like prison!]
Update: I’ve been defriended. So, no more cute baby pictures and Right-Wing rantings for me.
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