1. Writing that novel you’ve been putting off for years.
Woof. If only it could write itself! How are you ever gonna find time for that?
2. Giving your master bedroom that makeover you’ve been talking about since you moved in.
Tarps, ladders, paint swatches, and fumes — just the thought of all those fumes will be enough to send you into a deep procrastination spiral.
3. Saving up part of each paycheck to pay for travel around the world.
Did you forget about the part where you have to pay rent? This will leave you very, VERY broke.
4. Reading all the books on your shelf that have been collecting dust.
Books sound nice, but so does binge-watching TV series. Plus, do you know how many pages are in Moby-Dick?
5. Learning how to speak French before your summer trip to Paris.
You may perfect how to pronounce “je ne sais quoi” convincingly, but you can forget about having all that accent aigu and accent grave business anywhere close to mastered by then.
6. Writing more letters and postcards to your friends in other cities.
Do you know how expensive stamps are these days? Think about the hand cramps you’re gonna get! Youch - better rethink this one.
7. Learning how to crochet to make a blanket for your friend/sister/co-worker’s new baby.
Your dog will eat the yarn, your hand will cramp up, and the wonky pot holder you end up with will prove that this is just way too ambitious.
8. Wake up 10 minutes early to meditate before work each day.
Meditation is just a little bit too relaxing, and the snooze button is too tempting. Ack! This is impossible.
9. Learning how to play an instrument. Any instrument.
Contrary to what this bear would have you believe, the trumpet takes quite some time to master.