Top 10 Post St. Patrick’s Day Traditions

Because today you may be with Irish, but tomorrow you’re an accountant or something.

1. The mass-apology text message.

2. Gently storing your green-stripped Dr. Seuss hat until next year.

3. Heading to the greasiest diner for breakfast at 2:30PM.

4. Remembering you’re not even remotely Irish.

5. Scrubbing green dye and shame off everything, everywhere.

6. Throwing out the leftover corned beef and cabbage.

7. Punching anyone still wearing green.

8. Going back to not liking Guinness.

9. Untagging photos of yourself on Facebook.

10. Grumbling as you walk past trash from the parade you didn’t attend.

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