4. The cords are safe, and the walls are only mostly ruined.
8. If you can afford a Keurig, you can afford to order Chinese food.
9. Great, now you have to eat the whole box.
Ok. Maybe this ones not so bad.
12. All the popcorn in my hair was worth it. All the butter was not.
13. This helps your friends identify the jerk. Pro tip: It’s you.
14. Your collar is so straight, and your neck only suffered 2nd degree burns.
#RetrainYourBrain - Virgin Mobile