10 Holidays To Celebrate Instead Of Famous Holidays

Celebrating mainstream holidays is so mainstream. Celebrate your holiday hipster with The Cheesecake Factory.

1. May 1: Mother Goose Day instead of May Day

Andy Roberts / Via Flickr: aroberts

Celebrate Mother Goose Day by reciting nursery rhymes and, for dinner, cooking a juicy, delicious—oh, um. Salad. Cook a juicy salad.

2. July 4: Sidewalk Egg Frying Day instead of Independence Day

TheeErin / Via Flickr: theeerin

We’d suggest first laying down a piece of aluminum foil, or ordering eggs that weren’t cooked on the street. Your call.

3. September 2, 2013: National Beheading Day instead of Labor Day

Terry Whalebone / Via Flickr: terry_wha

In related holidays, September 3 is Change Your Identity Day, September 4 is Go On The Lam Day, September 5 is Get Caught By Police Day, and September 6 is the anniversary of your life sentence.

4. September 13, 2013: Blame Someone Else Day instead of Friday the Thirteenth

jim simonson / Via Flickr: rocketjim54

Steve wrote this terrible caption. Steve’s the worst.

5. October 14, 2013: Be Bald and Free Day instead of Columbus Day

malehmann / Via Flickr: 42302769@N00

Every other day is Have Hair And Be Chained To An Endless List of Grooming Products Day.

6. October 31: Increase Your Psychic Powers Day instead of Halloween

Living in Monrovia / Via Flickr: livinginmonrovia

Think of a number. Are you thinking of it? Two.

Psychic’d.

7. November 27, 2013: Pins and Needles Day instead of Chanukah

Alex Askew / Via Flickr: aaskew

Celebrate by letting your arm fall asleep and not complaining about it, which is—in fact—an impossible feat.

8. November 28, 2013: Make Your Own Head Day instead of Thanksgiving

mendhak / Via Flickr: mendhak

In all seriousness, we’re celebrating this holiday.

9. November 29, 2013: Square Dance Day instead of Black Friday

rickpilot_2000 / Via Flickr: 26531284@N02

November 28 is Frantically Learn To Square Dance Day.

10. December 25: A’phabet Day (No ‘L’ Day) instead of Christmas

Basheer Tome / Via Flickr: basheertome

Ce ebrate with your fami y and oved ones.

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