This picture sums up the '90s pretty nicely.

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The Best Links:

1. Via WTFoodge

MOVIE BUZZ: It's not that surprising that Will Smith's new movie kind of stinks, but the ending is drawing particular ire (thanks in part to a really amusing NYT review). So what is it? (Obvious SPOILER ALERT for those who care): There is a lot about car wrecks and organ donation but apparently, Will Smith commits suicide by jellyfish, which allows Rosario Dawson and Woody Harrelson to find each other and cry. There is also something about eggplant parmesan. Now you know.

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The Best Links:

1. How Bad Is Seven Pounds’ Ending, Anyway?
2. Oops, this review kind of gives it away.
3. There are many theories in this comment thread.
4. A.O. Scott’s Review
5. Onion AV Club Review of ‘Seven Pounds’
6. ‘Seven Pounds’ on Wikipedia

CELEBRITY BUZZ: A Page Six blind item asks which Hollywood hunk in a summer movie is a violent, closeted homosexual who ass-raped a victim and sent him to the hospital? The speculation is flying! James Franco, Will Smith, and Christian Bale are all suspects. My ass aches just thinking about all the possibilities!

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The Best Links:

1. JUST ASKING- New York Post Blind Item
2. They Really Think It’s Will Smith
3. Polls: So Really, Which Actor Raped His Gay Lover?
4. Dominic Cooper, Vin Diesel, Christian Bale and Brendan Fraser All Suspects
5. That’s Some Rough Ass Play!
6. My Guess Is Christian Bale

CELEBRITY BUZZ: Will Smith recently confirmed long-standing rumors about his marriage, citing that their “open policy” on sleeping with other people is what has kept their bond so strong. “You don’t avoid what’s natural…and you’re [inevitably] going to be attracted to people,” says Smith. Will this unusual practice be taught in the couple’s Not-Scientology school for kids ? As long as they keep their Thetan count low (I don’t even know what that means)!

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The Best Links:

1. If True Love Means Bedhopping, Then the Smiths Are in It for the Long Haul!
2. “On a Natural Level I Would LOVE to Eat a Gallon of Strawberry Ice Cream But My Body Would Suffer and Gain Weight So I RESIST the Desire to Feed Into the Desires of My Flesh!” [Why Will And Jada Need Jesus]
3. Will Smith: “I Don’t Let a Day Go Past That Jada Doesn’t Feel Like the Queen of the World.” [Except Maybe When He’s Boinking Another Lady]

CELEBRITY BUZZ: Will Smith is starting a new private school called New Village Academy, which he insists is NOT a Scientology facility. The Children of Scientology are so much scarier than teen goths!

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The Best Links:

1. New Private School Sounds a Lot Like a Scientology Training Camp
2. Will Smith Denies Students Will Be Taught Scientology Lessons
3. It’s a Private School - They Can Do What They Want
4. Lesson One: Africa Needs More Goats
5. Top Ten Ways to Really Know If Your Child’s School Is Scientologist
6. Will Smith Opens Scientology School, Despite Being a Non-Scientologist
7. Dear Will, Stop Insulting Your Fan’s and the Media’s Intelligence!
8. Don’t See What the Big Deal Is about Scientology
9. L Rob Hubbard’s “Study Technology” Will Be Taught
10. The School Offers Classes On Yoga, Robotics and Etiquette
11. Los Angeles Times Has a Photo of the School
12. “The actor must prove there is no Scientology link to his pet project”

MOVIE BUZZ: Despite a seeming inability to release a film that does poorly at the box office, Will Smith may have a real stinker on his hands with Hancock . I love the premise of this film (resentful superhero!) and am not immune to the charms of Will Smith, but if the reviews are to be believed, mistakes were made in its making. I’m also sad that the trailer does, in fact, contain a spoiler (though I won’t say what).

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The Best Links:

1. Oh Will Smith: “‘I’m not the most charming man in the world.”
2. A Spoiler-Laden Review From Someone Who Saw An Earlier Version
3. Roger Friedman Hates “Hancock”
4. Variety: Smells Like “Last Action Hero”
5. Smith Still Shines
6. Terrible Pre Buzz For Mr. Smith

MOVIE BUZZ: The DVD release of the Will Smith end-of-times blockbuster contains a few surprises. Since I Am Legend has been out a long time, we don’t still have to say spoiler alert, right? Anyway, the alternate ending included with the DVD release on March 18 goes in a totally different direction than the one you saw in theaters, one much more in line with the spirit of the book the movie was based on. Catch it before Warner Bros gets the lawyers involved!

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The Best Links:

1. You Must Watch This: The Non-Audience Tested Ending
2. “This changes the movie completely.”
3. Vote For YOUR Fave
4. The Reshoots Gave It The Boring Ending You Saw At The Theater