1. 

2. 

   Somebody get this truck a bandage!

3. 

1. He thinks that Obama is a racist

   This is the clip that started the whole controversy. Beck on "Fox and Friends" saying that Obama has a "deep seeded hatred for white people."

2. 2. He's got time and a camera

   Beck does his best to thoroughly creep out US Weekly correspondent Dina Sansing by offering to take a few candid nude photos of her to spread around the office.

3. 3. He thinks screaming like a toddler is ok

   Glenn Beck chooses to use his big boy words when the discourse gets a little too intellectual. He then (naturally) defends his decision to Bill O'Reilly.

4. 4. He wants America to get attacked by terrorists

   Beck and his guest, Michael Scheuer, think that we need another good, old-fashioned terrorist attacks to get us off our lazy, peaceful asses.

5. 5. He is not trained in CPR

   When guest David Buckner faints, Beck really isn't sure how to handle the situation, but thinks that Buckner should probably just keep talking about banks or whatever anyways.

6. 6. He secretly suspects all Muslims are terrorists

   When Minnesota elected the first Muslim Congressman, Keith Ellison, Glenn Beck had him on to make sure he wasn't one of those sneaky Al-Qaeda in disguise.

7. 7. He's not convinced Obama's not the Anti-Christ

   Look, a lot of people are saying that Obama could be the anti-christ. Glenn isn't saying he is, but he's just keeping an open mind about it.

8. 8. He condones spoon worship

   The key to America's success is guidance from your God, or dinette set, or whatever it is you worship.

9. 9. He makes fun of the handicapped

   Not only that, the handicapped woman he is making fun of is President Obama's aunt of all people.

10. 10. He fakes crying

    A lot of people think that his crying is a stunt he pulls to boost his ratings.

A home security camera recently caught a UPS guy hopping out of his truck, flinging a package at the house from the street, hopping back in, and driving away. Insert “What can brown do for you?” joke here.

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