Not that Taylor Lautner isn't supremely attractive (homosaywhat?), but nothing reveals the mark of a Sexy Mom using YouTube quite like reading “Is he legal yet???” scrawled across a teenager's abs. We can see the porn title already: Vampires, Werewolves, and Cougars, Oh My!

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The Best Links:

1. via Z103

Cute, skinny, teenaged Seth Rogen tells a lot of Jewish jokes. There is actually a pretty amusing Cain/Abel constipation joke in there.

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The Best Links:

1. Via The Daily What

CULTURE BUZZ: Producers likely inspired by the jaw-dropping profit of High School Musical are debuting in this new musical led by a cast comprised exclusively of teenagers. Written about a New York-bred kid whose family picks up and moves to Indiana, the bar mitzvah boy (yes, seriously) has to deal with adjusting to life in a brand new school. And with the website touting players based on stock characters like “gossip,” “jock,” “beauty,” and “wannabe,” parents in the audience can expect to be involuntarily overcome with memories of acne, bad fashion, and awkward dating rituals.

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The Best Links:

1. 13 The Musical
2. “A Funny, Exciting Love Letter to Childhood”
3. “What It Means To Be A Friend” [Like “Mean Girls” With Music]
4. The Cast Performs at “Broadway On Broadway”
5. A Cast Comprised Solely of Teenagers? Sounds Like a Dream.
6. The Show’s Tagline: “A New Musical About the Labels That Last a Lifetime.” (…Intense, No?)

TV BUZZ: The MTV show — which has suffered increasingly sagging ratings — will end its 10-year-run in November, when it will air a two-hour special on a Saturday afternoon. Now where will screaming teenage girls catch a glimpse of The Jonas Brothers? Oh, right — everywhere.

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The Best Links:

1. MTV Cancels Its Last Show
2. TRL Ends (“But Will Be Back,” Assure Producers)
3. FNMTV The New TRL?
4. WTF is FNMTV, and Why is It Pretty Awesome?
5. The History Behind 10-Year-Old TRL
6. Remember Jesse Camp???

The New York Times reports that Chinese gymnasts may be under the legal age of 16. In the words of former champion Mary Lou Retton: “The girls are so little, so young…They said she was 16, but I don’t know.” And check out the photo selection from the perverts at the New York Times!

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The Best Links:

1. Proof: Documents Prove Chinese Gymnasts Are Underage
2. The New York Times Story On Under Age Chinese Competitors
3. IOC Investigates He Kexin’s Age, May Strip Medals
4. Gymnast He Kexin Looks 12, Might Be 14, Claims To Be 16.
5. Gymnast Ass: There Is A Pervert Photo Journalist At The Olympics
6. Tiny Chinese Gymnasts In Normal Clothes (PHOTO)
7. Age Scandal Could Be “Yet Another Black Eye for China in the Buildup to the Games”

“All The Way Around”, the first single off Ali Lohan’s upcoming album, has been released online. The 14-year-old sister of Lindsay Lohan describes her sound as “hip-hop. Kind of like Rihanna.” So lets recap: Ali has a single out, Lindsay has a single out , and the family has their own reality show . Big summer for the Lohans, I guess! Dina must be stoked.

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The Best Links:

1. “All The Way Around” Premier on People.com
2. Ali Lohan Interview: Living Lohan and Her Upcoming Album
3. Ali Lohan Photos
4. Ali Lohan’s Official Music Site
5. Lindsay Lohan’s New Album

CULTURE BUZZ: What’s up with all the babies making babies? While some blame President Bush’s insistent promotion of abstinence (or its medical term “Genitalia Imaginaris”), others think that old sleeper hit Juno is to blame. Between Jamie Lynn Spears , the Gloucester girls , and The Baby Borrowers , don’t be surprised if our next President gives an official government job to [my favorite] creepy baby photog Anne Geddes .

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The Best Links:

1. Baby Bumps: The New Uggs?
2. “Here Comes ‘The Baby Borrowers’ to Deglamorize Parenthood All Over Again! “
3. Pro-lifers Couldn’t Be Happier
4. Abortion Rates Falling - Thank You, Juno?
5. “Entrusting and Empowering Women With Their Own Reproductive Decisions Might Be a More Auspicious Strategy for Reducing Overall Abortion Numbers Than Seeking to Impose Draconian and Patronizing Juridical and Legislative Bans and Bars to Abortion” [Okay, So What Are You Trying To Say?]
6. Teen Pregnancy Rates On The Decline? Jezebel Weighs In
7. Juno Makes Teen Pregnancy “Absurdly Simple”
8. Tabloids to Blame?

Contestant in the 2008 National Spelling Bee mistakes “numnah” for “numbnut.” I watch the spelling bee precisely for endearingly awkward adolescent moments such as this one.

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The Best Links:

1. The Crowd Gets a Good Laugh

CULTURE BUZZ: Chilean youth calling themselves “pokemones” are rebelling against their parents by having public sex orgies. Gotta catch ‘em all! STD’s that is….

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The Best Links:

1. Newsweek Profiles Chile’s Disaffected Youth
2. Teen Rebellion Through Public Orgies Are a Far Cry from the Typical Kegger
3. Chilean Youth Obsessed with Japanese Anime Culture
4. Related: Pete Wentz at Nordstrom
5. Newsweek Is Just trying to Scandalize a Relatively-Stable Latin American Country

MOVIE BUZZ: Gus Van Sant’s new movie about teenage skateboarders opens this weekend. If anything can make us regain interest in Gus Van Sant, it’s hot sk8er bois! And the cinematography is nice, too, we guess.

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The Best Links:

1. Morally Hollow, But Beautiful All the Same
2. YouTube - Paranoid Park Official Movie Trailer 2008
3. Slant Magazine Gives It 3.5 Stars out of 4
4. NY Times Gives Paranoid Park a Great Review
5. Movie Review: Paranoid Park Gets a B Plus
6. The Best Film of 2008 (Thus Far)
7. Get Screenshots and More on IMDB
8. New Trailer Actually Makes Me Want to See the Movie
9. Compare and Contrast: Gus Van Sant Movie Posters

CULTURE BUZZ: With the popularity of Stephenie Meyers’ Twilight series , teen vampire lit is the new trend in young adult fiction. It’s the typical teenage dilemma again: she’s human, he’s a vampire. For teenage girls with a dark side, these vampire books are a lot more appealing than all those rich-girl prep-school books.

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The Best Links:

1. Vampires Are the Latest Fad Amongst Teenage Girls
2. Stephenie Meyer’s Teenage Vampire Series Transcends Most YA Lit
3. I just don’t get the Twilight hoopla
4. Review of “Vampire Kisses” - Not as Good as the Twilight Series
5. New York Observer young adult article
6. Twilight Books Have Too Much Pre-Marital Sex (Wait, That’s a Bad Thing??)
7. Cast Revealed for Teen Vampire Flick “Twilight”
8. List on Amazon.com: “Teen vampire romances”
9. In Teen Circles, Stephenie Meyers Is Bigger than Harry Potter

MUSIC BUZZ: The New York Times writes about a German teen-pop sensation that somehow manages to make My Chemical Romance look less ridiculous. We thought Panic at the Disco would be the apex of teenage gothdom, until we heard Tokio Hotel. It just proves that as far as life skills go, it’s more important to be good at applying guyliner than writing pop hooks.

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The Best Links:

1. Girls at the Show Claim They’re The “Biggest Band Ever OMG”
2. YouTube - Tokio Hotel - “Scream” OFFICIAL Music Video
3. Tokio Hotel Somehow Makes it to Front Page of NY Times
4. “It’s Officially Tokio Hotel Day on Gawker”
5. Not Your Typical Manufactured Boy Band! Well, A, They’re From Germany….
6. New Tokio Hotel Video Interviews
7. Official UK Homepage
8. Who is Tokio Hotel? All Your Questions Answered on Wikipedia
9. “My Life As a Teenage Goth”

FOOD BUZZ: The Mosquito, a device which emits a high frequency sound that only people under 25 can hear is being marketed as a way to disperse groups on teenagers. The annoying sound emitted from the Mosquito is succeeded at driving away scary ‘yobs’ in the U.K. Youth advocacy groups are calling for a ban on the devices.

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The Best Links:

1. High Frequency Teenager Deterrent - Mosquito Device Used To Disperse Teen Groups
2. Buzz Off! The Anti-Mosquito Movement
3. Mosquito Official Website Compound Security Systems
4. The Mosquito Finally Makes Its Way to NYC
5. Mosquito Breach of Human Rights?
6. Activists Offended by Mosquito Teenage Alarms
7. Ultrasonic Teenage Deterrent
8. ‘The Mosquito’ Infringes On The Rights Of The Young
9. “Call To Ban Anti-Social Teenager Mosquito Devices”
10. Dude, This is Like So Unfair!

CULTURE BUZZ: One of the most popular profiles on YouTube features videos of a young girl named “magibon” or “MRirian” staring bashfully into a webcam. Her profile says she is 21-years old but various sources say she is actually only 14. Wonder if her parents know she is getting hundreds of thousands of views each week? She looks like she is either gonna break out into tears or peals of laughter.

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The Best Links:

1. Magibon’s Channel
2. Girls in Japan
3. Magibarf
4. Will the real magibon please stand up?
5. This Girl Creeps Me Out
6. Is She Faking Us out?
7. Unclear if latest YouTube craze has deep sociological meaning
8. Magibon is Playing the Lolita Game
9. Magibon’s Blog - With Pics! (It’s in Japanese)
10. Little Girl’s Bed in Background Probably Makes Magibon Extra Creepy/Popular
11. Young Girl plus Big Eyes plus No Words equals Web Traffic for Magibon
12. Japanese Girl With Pigtails = Classic Magibon
13. A Rare Video Where Magibon Actually Talks (Japanese)
14. Magibon’s MySpace (Why Is It Set to Private???)
15. MRirian on Encyclopedia Dramatica - She’s a “Pedobait Wapanese Camwhore”
16. Magi Videos
17. Magibon Fan Blog is in Japanese But It Does Not Really Matter Because She Rarely Talks
18. Magibon’s Evil Cuteness

CULTURE BUZZ: Not all teens get famous via sex scandals, early pregnancy or school shootings. With the end of the year nigh, here are a few young ‘uns who give us some hope for the future.

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The Best Links:

1. Malcolm Mays (17), Teenage Movie Director
2. Isha Jain (16), Winner Of a $100,000 Scholarship
3. Rachel Rosenfeld (17) Opens a School In Rural Cambodia
4. Nathan Smith (15), An Offduty Lifeguard Who Saved 5 Girls In New Zealand
5. Tom Foust (17), Pulled A Granny From Her Car Before A Train Hit It

CULTURE BUZZ: A new study at the University of Virginia says teenagers who have consensual sex early are less likely to become delinquents. The conclusion contradicts an Ohio State study from earlier this year. Let the culture wars continue!

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The Best Links:

1. Study Debunks Theory on Teen Sex, Delinquency
2. Early Teen Sex May Not Be a Path to Delinquency, Study Shows
3. Midwest Teen Sex Show: A Video Show about Teen Sexuality
4. The Mind-Booty Problem: Rethinking the Age of Sexual Consent
5. A Snapshot of Teen Sex
6. Too Much TV, Low Self Esteem and a Bad Relationship With Your Folks? A Recipe for Early Teen Sex - But Not, Apparently, a Life of Deliquency
7. Sex, Etc.: A Web Site by Teens for Teens
8. Early Sex May Lead Teens to Delinquency, Study Shows (Ohio State Study)
9. Abstinence Not Curbing Teen Sex

CULTURE BUZZ: This new book is an ode to the “greatest teen magazine of all time.” In other news, Jane Pratt is all over the place these days. If you’re a girl who happened to come of age in the early 1990’s, you’ll appreciate this (I just pre-ordered my copy)! Otherwise, all apologies. Go look at some sideboob and check back later.

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The Best Links:

1. Book Balances the Fun Good Effects of “Sassy” with the Catty Backbiting that Occurred
2. Nothing Has Lived up To Sassy’s Legacy
3. Sassy Was the One Magazine that Made Me Feel Cool
4. To Girls, ‘Sassy’ Meant Something More
5. How Christina Kelly Changed Jane Pratt’s Life
6. Are women’s magazines evil?
7. “Behold Jane Pratt’s Legacy”
8. These Authors Stole My Senior Thesis Idea!
9. “Sassy” Really Did Change My Life, Actually
10. Gawker Calls the Book “Almost Certainly Awesome”
11. “Jane Pratt Kisses and Tells With Drew Barrymore”
12. Jane Pratt Quits Her Own Magazine, Will Start Up “Jane Radio” on the Sirius Network