If Super Mario lived in a world defined by New York Times trend pieces. It's a world where he might actually fit in with that ironic moustache of his.

The Best Links:

1. via 9GAG

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In flip book form, this is what would have happened if Jesus had jumped off the cross and turned into Mario.

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Mario and Pac-Man fight to the death!

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For those of you perverts who always wondered what Mario looked like underneath the overalls.

The Best Links:

1. Via Kotaku

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Common phobias illustrated by Mario himself. Who has kind of a lot to be legitimately frightened of.

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The crazy kids at Something Awful uncovered this beyond-terrible porno parody of Super Mario Bros. featuring Ron Jeremy as Squeegie, a computer program who - with his brother, Ornio - gets stuck inside the computer (and a boatload of vaginas - HEY-O!). Squeegie eventually rescue the princess from King Pooper (!) by “throwing him in a bathtub and turning him to smoke,” which should give you a pretty good idea about how much you want to own this.

The Best Links:

1. Get the Full History

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Oh sweet Princess Peach why would you let such a dark thing happen in the Mushroom Kingdom? Some poor bro carved a classic Nintendo controller into his forearm and then proceeded to peel the skin off from inside the shapes. Wowzers.

The Best Links:

1. Man Cuts Nintendo Controller Into Arm
2. 4 Real (via Balk)
3. Nintendo Fan Snijdt Controller in Arm
4. “The stencil went on, and we were ready to go. Starting with the lines, the pain wasn’t half as bad as I’d expected,” explains Metal_Games. “In fact, it was a breeze for the most part. It took Jeffrey, the artist, about 20 minutes to cut all the lines. A couple of deep breaths, and we went straight on to removing the skin…”

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It's hard when your sibling is always outshining you in the eyes of the public.

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The video (and song) are taken from the perspective of the extremely relatable Toad, whose sole purpose in the game is to wait for Mario in order to guide him to the next castle. I wish I was still in college so I could write my thesis about existential social theory in Mario games.

The Best Links:

1. Toad’s Story from the Super Mario Wiki
2. About Toad’s Castle

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The nerd factor here is kind of off the charts.

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It's Super Mario Bros. meets Duck Hunt! And it actually looks like it'd be fun to play. Somebody get on this, please.

The Best Links:

1. Guitar Hero in 1982

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TECH BUZZ: A Japanese guy created an insanely difficult Super Mario World. In case you weren’t balding enough, here’s an activity that will make you really want to tear your hair out.

The Best Links:

1. YouTube - Asshole Mario Stage 1
2. YouTube - Asshole Mario Stage 2
3. YouTube - Asshole Mario Stage 3
4. Sadistically Hard, But “Asshole” Actually Isn’t In the Original Title
5. Download the Game Here (Although the Link Seems to Be Down Now)
6. “So Unbelievably Geeky and Amazing”
7. YouTube - Asshole Mario Stage 4
8. If You Play This, You Will Go Insane
9. Yet Another Difficult Mario Mod

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