Another sport not quite safe for narcoleptics. A new sport great for these sleeping beauties? Nap contests.

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SPORTS BUZZ: Because mountain biking isn't hardcore enough, a father/son duo picked-up Municycling; unicycling with an “M” for mountain. They just conquered the 14,433-foot Mount Elbert, the highest peak in Colorado, while not wearing clown suits, for unknown reasons. Just sayin' it would've made the feat much harder to top.

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The Best Links:

1. Father, Son Balance Love of Unicycling With Fourteeners
2. 14Fourteeners - Their Blog!
3. Their Picasa Photo Album

How come no one told THE_REAL_SHAQ he was being traded from Phoenix to Cleveland? Twitter's favorite sports star had to find the important info out the way I find out if my coworker liked her Subway sandwich: on Twitter!

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The Best Links:

1. Did Shaq Just Find Out He Was Traded On Twitter?
2. “ESPN.com’s Chris Broussard reports that, pending owner approval, Shaquille O’Neal will be sent from Phoenix to Cleveland for flotsam (Ben Wallace), jetsam (Sasha Pavlovic), and a second round pick in Thursday’s draft.”
3. Come you guys, someone tell Shaq what’s going on: “How come nobody told me lsu won, congrats champs Lsu Love shaq university”

The Dallas Cowboys unveiled their new stadium TV, and it's the biggest HDTV in the world! This also makes their cheerleaders super-sized too. Innovation!

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The Best Links:

1. Cowboys Unveil World’s Largest HDTV

SPORTS BUZZ: At the Penguathlon - being housed by the Kelly Tarlton Arctic Encounter in just outside Auckland - 80 penguins are competing in games of football, frisbee, surfing, swing ball and …wait for it… WADDLE RACES! Sadly, the video contains no audio, but seeing a bunch of penguins play soccer (excuse us, “football”) is enough to give anyone the will to live (so we'll be okay without the sounds of penguins on ice).

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After months of being bombarded with the NBA's “Where Will Amazing Happen?” ad campaign, the YouTube masses have responded with a new wave of parody videos. This just proves that filming stuff in black & white and adding slow piano music can make anything super dramatic. See more “Where Amazing Happens” parodies at Urlesque .

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The Best Links:

1. All of the Where Amazing Happens commercials on YouTube
2. See more parodies at Urlesque
3. Spoofs of the NBA’s “Where Amazing Happens” promos are all over YouTube.
4. Shaq vs. Oprah [PIC]
5. Shaq on a Diet [VIDEO]
6. Shaq’s Rap [VIDEO]

Link: http://deadspin.com/5192302/massachus...

Unfortunately, he no longer holds the position, but still, his email to the parents is worth reading. Remember: “My heckling of the refs is actually helping them develop as people.”

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In the hunt for a sweet, sweet sponsorship deal, the French pole vaulter Romain Mesnil took his clothes off and exposed his pole to the world. Good idea! Meanwhile, Michael Phelps is still hoping for a few more calls following that whole bong incident.

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The Best Links:

1. Naked Vaulting Champ Lets Pole Fly Free In Paris
2. Naked Pole Vaulter Seeks Sponsor
3. Mesnil Nu Dans Paris Preview

This is my nomination for the absolute worst Super Bowl party ever.

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The Best Links:

1. Via Holy Taco

SPORTS BUZZ: Ivan Ukhov was totally hammered on Vodka Red Bulls at last week’s Athletissima high jumping meet. After his jump attempt in which he executed a running flop onto the mat, league officials are demanding an explanation.

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The Best Links:

1. Ivan Ukhov drunk before his last jump at Athletissima 08
2. Strangely, Vodka and Red Bull Won’t Improve Your High Jumping Ability
3. IAAF asks ‘drunk’ Russian jumper for explanation
4. Han drakk Red Bull og vodka (The First Norweigan News Article)
5. Jumping Under the Influence

SPORTS BUZZ: A new study has shown that cheerleading is the most dangerous school sport for females. Two-thirds of all catastrophic injuries among high school and college girls have been from cheerleading accidents. Apparently, that’s worse than gymnastics and track & field combined. It kinda gives you a whole new respect for spirit fingers.

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The Best Links:

1. Cheerleading’s Risky Lack of Rules - TIME
2. Girls’ Most Dangerous Sport: Cheerleading | LiveScience
3. As Cheerleaders Soar Higher, So Does the Danger - New York Times
4. Cheerleader Accidents Compilation

SPORTS BUZZ: Lego enthusiasts from Hong Kong have created a miniature Beijing Olympics! Made up of 300,000 Lego bricks and over 4,500 Lego people, the miniature Lego city includes the infamous Bird’s Nest Stadium, Michael Phelps’ Water Cube, and George W. Bush’s favorite Olympic hot spot, Beach Volleyball! All in all, it measures an impressive 10ft by 26ft.

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The Best Links:

1. Where Everyone’s Quick Off the Blocks
2. Olympics For The Geeks
3. Lighting Inside Water Cube Not By Stock Legos
4. HKLUG Design
5. Nobody Could Protest The Lego Olympics
6. The Lego Store
7. Lego Album Covers
8. Lego Movies

Two MMA fighters knock each other out simultaneously. This must be at least as rare as an unassisted triple play — at a fight in Indiana, Shaun Parker and Tyler Bryan fight to a draw on account of a double KO.

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SPORTS BUZZ: An elderly home for retired priests and nuns in Australia has taken up the sport of fencing. This makes me wish more sports uniforms consisted of cardigans instead of jerseys. Check out the cute photos .

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The Best Links:

1. Fencing for old people - Great Photo Gallery!
2. Australian fencing instructor teaches priests to foil old age
3. Reluctant Elderly Afraid Fencing Could Make Them Fall Over