When fruit filling resembles rectal membrane, you know you're done with shortbread cookies 4eva! For the record, that's the first time in almost two years that I've included “rectal membrane” in a Buzzfeed post, so, yeah, you could say I'm a pioneer.
Remember when Kathie Lee Gifford wasn't a boozy, openly-bigoted, undersexed comic genius, and everyone hated her for pretending to be perfect? This “fitness video” is from that era. If saying our prayers means we'll get a romp in the sack with a “Human Love Machine,” we're going to have to stick with the atheism. Thanks anyway, K'Lee! (via Everything Is Terrible, of course)