Remember that egg masturbator that helped the Masturbation Champion last 9 whole hours? Tenga's got a new designy vagina-simulation toy for you. From the looks of it, couldn't you just masturbate with some hollowed-out computer speakers?
It turns out the swine flu is caused by excessive masturbation. Also the bubonic plague, baldness, nightmares - all kinds of trouble.
It looks like masturbating in the showers at the University of Michigan is an honor code violation. Their auto industry is falling apart but their ejaculate is industrial!
Ernest Borgnine is 91 and he has a lot of wisdom to share. Wow, that was so beautiful. Let's all remember to respect our elders.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/121192 ![[link]](http://s2.buzzfeed.com/static/images/public/icons/external-link2.png){kind=icon}
What happens when “cumgoblin fuckstick extravaganza” gets mixed up with “Have a good day at school, dear!” A truly embarrassing tale.
A new video from Pink, in which she makes sex on herself! I wish I could somehow find a way to make a “Pinky and the Brain” joke here, but it's just not coming to me.
Every time you hit refresh on this site, another cat is shot in cold blood. So go ahead and resume…normal activity.
On Fox & Friends, 91-year-old Ernest Borgnine says the secret to staying young at his old age is masturbation. This is why I love old people!!!!
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