Thousands Of Dead Fish Washing Up In Chicago

Thousands of gizzard shad have been turning up dead along the Chicago lakefront recently. Michigan Program biologist Dan Makauskas speculated that the young shad may not have built up enough reserves to survive the cold, but says the die-off is abnormal. Basically, this is just another sign that the world is ending. View List ›

Matt Stopera 2 years ago 12 responses

Mass Bird Deaths Are God’s Punisment For Repealing DADT

According to “respected prophet” Cindy Jacobs, God is punishing birds because the United Stated military now openly accepts homosexuals. I wonder what her explanation is for the tragedy that is her taste in clothing. Watch Video ›

Tanner Ringerud 2 years ago 51 responses

Which Animals Are Next?

As I predicted, the mass animal deaths of 2011 have already begun! And lo! We’ve already seen the destruction of hundreds of birds, fish, crabs, and other animals. Unless humanity changes its ways, these cute animals will be next. So say I, NOSTRADAMUS. View List ›

Nostradamus 2 years ago 26 responses

BREAKING: Hundreds Of Dead Birds Found In Texas

Texas now becomes the fourth state to experience mass bird deaths. Charlie Muller, a biologist with the Texas Parks and Wildlife Administration, notes that bird deaths, while not uncommon, seldom occur in numbers this large. DUN DUN DUN. View Image ›

Matt Stopera 2 years ago 23 responses

Track Recent Mass Animal Deaths Using Google Maps

The end days at your fingertips. Kudos, Google, for making the end of all life on Earth so easy and convenient to keep track of. View Media ›

Tanner Ringerud 2 years ago 66 responses