Link: http://www.cracked.com/blog/will-you-...

One gentleman publicly asks for the beloved comedienne's hand in marriage. It's just a little ring and a couple of words, right? Let's make it happen!

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FOOD BUZZ: As divorce parties become more common, so do the trappings that accompany them. Next: expensive divorce party invitations, divorce party planners.

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The Best Links:

1. “I say, let’s publicly celebrate divorce.”
2. Cheap Divorces - Featured on BuzzFeed
3. A Cake For Break-Ups

TECH BUZZ: Of 6500 professional men surveyed by Sheraton Hotels, 35 percent of them preferred their Blackberries to their wives. Immediately, the wives responded, “Well maybe if you’d learn how to use your thumbs at the same time in the bedroom, we wouldn’t have this problem!” (Ba dum bum!)

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The Best Links:

1. The Poll Results
2. Are Ladies Just As Addicted As Men?
3. A Psychologist Can Salvage Your Relationship: “Turn It Off.”
4. Personal Digital Assistants Vs. Private Displays Of Affection
5. Is Your BlackBerry Ruining Your Sex Life?

POLITICS BUZZ: An inspiring love story ends in divorce. She nursed her injured Marine to health and married him despite the fact that his face was completely disfigured by the blast from a suicide bomber. Now they are getting divorced. Having a national holiday created to honor your love is probably too much pressure for any marriage to bear.

The Best Links:

1. Inspiring Wedding Ends In Divorce
2. Famous Photo of Bridge And Disfigured Groom
3. Via Kottke

CELEBRITY BUZZ: At the taping of the “Ellen DeGeneres Show” yesterday, Ellen announces that she plans to marry Portia de Rossi now that the gay marriage ban has been lifted. Cynthia Nixon also plans to marry her lesbian partner. Hopefully this means that Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson are next, because that would make an amazing season of Newlyweds.

The Best Links:

1. Jenna Hager to Ellen: Use Our Ranch for Your Wedding
2. “Here’s What You Get For Allowing Gay Marriage in the State With All Those Famous People”
3. Watch the Announcement
4. Portia Is a Step Up from That Crazy Broke Anne Heche
5. Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww
6. They’re Perfect for One Another!
7. Ellen DeGeneres & Cynthia Nixon Talk Marriage
8. Announcement Gets Standing Ovation
9. Finding Vendors for Your Lesbian Wedding
10. Finding a Lesbian Wedding Dress
11. How to Plan a Jewish Lesbian Wedding

TECH BUZZ: Cat 5 ethernet rings are $175 and fit together perfectly for nerding, happily ever after. A reminder that no matter what, the rough times during your marriage won’t be anything a little software upgrade or patch won’t fix. For us cynics, it’s also a reminder that in relationships, it’s easy to get pwned.

The Best Links:

1. Buy the Jacked—Cat 5 Compliant Wedding Set on Etsy
2. Cat 5 Wedding Rings Help Nerdy Couples Express Love
3. What Kind of Woman Would Tolerate a Wedding Ring that Doubles as Electronic Hardware??
4. Geeky Girls Don’t Do Diamonds
5. Programmer Proposes by Hacking into his Girlfriend’s Favourite Video Game
6. I’m not THAT nerdy!