POLITICS BUZZ: While Americans welcomed their first black president with open arms, it seems they’re still not down with the gays getting, y’know, equal rights and stuff. You’d have thought that the country’s favorite talk show host could have at least warmed California over, for goodness’ sake.

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The Best Links:

1. Did Prop 8 Pass?
2. Two Steps Forward, One Step Back
3. Why We Lost Prop 8
4. California, Arizona, and Florida Vote Against Gay Rights
5. Andrew Sullivan: “We Shall Overcome. Do Not Be Discouraged. But We May Still Win.”

Who said Americans were egomaniacal ethnocentrics? We know exactly where our launderers come from, thank you very much. This map should come in handy if you’re deciding whether to spend your next vacation in a country of kangaroos or “pussies.”

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In the third installment of one of the funniest series online, Jen Kirkman tells us about George Washington’s favorite slave, Oney. If only this was how we were taught history in high school, maybe we would have stayed in that AP class after all.

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BUSINESS BUZZ: Mom-and-Pop stores should continue to cower in fear as this live map demonstrates the frighteningly rapid growth of America’s most ubiquitous superstore. Why do we feel so much less dirty shopping at Costco? Two words: free samples.

The Best Links:

1. See Wal-Mart Grow!

Gas prices reaching $4 per gallon!? That’s ridiculous, at least according to our President, who wasn’t aware. So is he trying to get assassinated now?

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CELEBRITY BUZZ: As if it weren’t already easy enough to begrudge the spoiled offspring of the rich and famous, Nick Hogan (son of Hulk and recent MIRRF Linda) is suing a Florida sherriff’s department after they released tapes of him complaining about spending eight months in jail (for drag racing while drunk, which has left his friend and fellow passenger in “critical condition”), specifically in a cell “half the size of [his] bathroom at home.” Nick was also allegedly recorded asking his pop to set him up with a reality show upon release from the clink. Because any good parent knows that after eight months in solitary confinement, a kid’s best chance at being healthily rehabilitated back into society is, of course, to be endlessly followed by cameras and manipulative producers.

The Best Links:

1. Nick Hogan, Kind of a Little Bitch
2. Nick Hogan Should Keep His Options Open
3. See How the Rich, Mildly Famous, and Incarcerated Live!
4. The Complete Jail Phone Recordings, Part 3
5. The Complete Jail Phone Recordings, Part 1
6. The Complete Jail Phone Recordings, Part 2
7. Bad Friends Drive With Drunks
8. Hulk Wants You to Know How God Feels
9. Video Footage from Hogan’s Crash

SCIENCE BUZZ: Childhood obesity rates among American kids may have finally leveled off after years of rising steadily. Perhaps parents have finally learned that three cheeseburgers isn’t going to help Jack and Jill climb the hill to fetch a pail of water (unless, of course, it’s a pail of cheeseburgers).

The Best Links:

1. Have We Hit a Plateau Or Just a Temporary Hill?
2. Despite the Alleged Plateau, 30% of American Kids Being Obese Could Spell Catastrophe
3. Mexican and African-American Girls Prove Ethnic Disparities Among Obese Kids

POLITICS BUZZ: Video parodies are popping up left and right in response to Hillary Clinton’s “Red Phone” ad campaign. Although would it really be so bad if we elected the cast of Ghostbusters to office? Our vote’s officially on Rick Moranis.

The Best Links:

1. Ghostbusters ‘08
2. Ad Inspires Response, Parody, Charges of Plagiarism
3. Casey Knowles, Girl in Clinton%u2019s %u20183 a.m.%u2019 Ad, Backs Obama!
4. Obama Responds to Clinton Campaign Ad
5. Ad Inspires Parody, Insipid Blog Posts
6. 3:02am
7. Jack Bauer For President
8. Scare Tactics Are “So 2002”
9. Bass Motives

POLITICS BUZZ: The Center For Public Integrity compiled a database of lies told by the Bush White House regarding Iraq since 2001, tallying 935. In other news, puppies are cute.

The Best Links:

1. Web Site Assembles U.S. Prewar Claims
2. False Statements Preceded War
3. Lies, Damned Lies, a Searchable Database of Lies
4. Today’s Must Read
5. Iraq: The War Card - The Center for Public Integrity
6. Center for Public Deception Lies About Bush’s Lies
7. George Soros Funded Study Says Bush Lied
8. Bush Administration Lied 935 Times in the Lead up to Iraq War
9. Playing The War Card
10. ThinkFast
11. George Soros Funds Center for Public Integrity Hit Piece
12. Study: False Statements Preceded War
13. The Truth About 935 Bush Lies