We Asked Non-Finns React To Photos Of Finnish Stuff And Now They're All Jealous

"You win, Finland."

I sent 12 uncaptioned photographs of Finland (and other Finnish stuff) to BuzzFeed's New York, Berlin, Paris, and London offices and asked them to write down what they saw. This is what they said:

1. Mämmi, a traditional Easter dessert made with dark molasses and malted rye

Flickr: tulenheimo

Maggy (London): "It looks like someone tore a liver out of a poor, innocent cow and covered it in milk."

Laura (London): "Hands off our Christmas pudding and brandy sauce."

Lauren (NY): "It looks like a slightly gelatinous brownie drowning in milk? I dig it."

Jim (London): "A heart attack on a plate."

Juliane (Berlin): "Mousse au chocolat, but I bet there's blood in there."

2. Mignon eggs, almond-hazelnut nougat filled eggs that are eaten at Easter

Flickr: mjs

Tom (London): "An enormous mini egg. Which... which would make it just an egg, I guess?"

Sarah (NY): "Egg inside an egg? Like Russian nesting dolls, but real eggs?"

Jamie (London): "A reverse Kinder Surprise."

Matt (London): "Nature just delivered what we all wanted: real chocolate eggs."

Robin (London): "OH SHIT YOU HAVE ACTUAL CHOCOLATE EGGS?! *books flight to Helsinki*"

3. The Northern Lights

Flickr: timo_w2s

Ailbhe (London): "This is so pretty it looks like a desktop background! So magical."

Flo (London): "This is where Santa Claus lives, quite clearly."

Lauren (NY): "This is so magical, I still can't believe people get to experience this on the reg."

Tom (London): "Clearly Photoshopped."

Sarah (NY): "Is this... the Northern Lights? Or chem-trails?"

4. Lordi, a heavy metal band who won Eurovision in 2006

Flickr: cote

Juliane (Berlin): "Lordi. Eurovision superstars. The best."

Robin (London): "Lordi. The band that the Beatles could have been!"

Sami (NY): "A terrifying metal band with a heart of gold."

Jim (London): "The greatest Scandi Eurovision entry."

Lauren (NY): "Is this Finnish zombie KISS?"

5. The Sibelius Monument in Helsinki

Flickr: felibrilu

Maggy (London): "It's a massive organ thing used to play the Finnish national anthem."

Juliane (Berlin): "This is where Finnish people go to get rid of all their anxieties. They scream them into the tubes."

Tom (London): "One of Finland's many feral pipe organs, which have escaped from churches and now roam the countryside scavenging food and playing hymns."

Jamie (London): "A photo demonstrating the importance of hiring a professional company to erect your scaffolding."

Bryant (NY): "Architecture porn."

6. Kalakukko, a rye pie with fish baked inside it

instagram.com

Robin (London): "This looks like meat shoved into hollowed out bread which, if you throw in Taylor Swift, is my idea of a perfect night in."

Paul (London): "Is this your version of a scotch egg?"

Jim (London): "Is that bacon? I'm hoping it involves bacon. In bread. Like a pre-baked bacon sandwich."

Sarah (NY): "A mom chewed up bacon and spit it into a bread bowl for her baby."

Maggy (London): "When you're a bad kid in Finland they throw you into the middle of that and you die instantly thanks to the stench."

7. Wife-carrying, a sport in which men run around an obstacle course carrying women around their shoulders

Flickr: visitlakeland

Here, I asked BuzzFeed staff to explain the rules of this sport.

Ailbhe (London): "First you must capture your new bride, and then carry her across water."

Maggy (London): "Guys have to run really fast while the girls on their backs tickle their bottoms."

Juliane (Berlin): "Steal your best friends girlfriend and see how far you get."

Sami (NY): "To become like Jesus, men must carry their wives as they walk on water."

Flo (London): "Men have to carry their woman like a back pack round a steeple chase course. The winners survive, everyone else gets eaten by a bear."

8. Karjalanpiirakka, rye pasties filled with rice which are often served with an egg butter

instagram.com

Flo (London): "That is a sweet pastry treat shaped like a vagina."

Laura (London): "Why would you make an apple pie into a vagina? Perverts."

Sami (NY): "A WILDLY SUGGESTIVE PASTRY."

Ailbhe (London): "If someone gave this to me at breakfast I would be initially like 'urgh' but would then try it and probably quite like it."

Matt (London): "Oh my, mind boggles."

9. Korvapuusti, cinnamon rolls

instagram.com

Ailbhe (London): "CINNAMON BUNS GIMME HELLO YUM."

Bryant (NY): "Some variation of a croissant, but fused with a pretzel. Looks great."

Tom (London): "A lovely dessert inspired pastry version of the smiling poop emoji."

Sarah (NY): "Pretzels/Cinnabons. I think they are having an identity crisis."

Flo (London): "I preferred the vagina pastry."

10. The Moomins, a series of children's book, comic, TV show, and film characters

en.wikipedia.org

Maggy (London): "They are the Finnish version of One Direction. The girl at the front is Zayn."

Jamie (London): "MOOMINS. Love these guys. Although you've just reminded me of the Groke, so there's my nightmares sorted for the next few weeks."

Bryant (NY): "Kangaroo, hippo, hippo, hippo, top pastry chef in the world."

Laura (London): "Hey, Moomins. Bet these dark little fuckers listen to nothing but metal. Especially the one with the rolling pin."

Robin (London): "The Moomins. Also know as the reason I would wake up screaming most nights for my entire childhood."

11. Kakslauttanen Igloo Village, a hotel in Lapland

Flickr: visitfinland

Sami (NY): "Typical Finnish neighborhood complete with underground igloo homes."

Flo (London): "Is this where you freeze your old people to wake them up in 1000 years when we've cracked the code to eternal life?"

Matt (London): "Cosy, snug. It's where you go in a nuclear fallout."

Paul (London): "I want to go to here and I am going to go and search how many legs I have to sell to do so."

Bryant (NY): "Glamping."

12. Leipäjuusto, squeaky cheese that is served hot with jam

instagram.com

Jim (London): "Pizza jam. Jam pizza. No idea, ban it now."

Juliane (Berlin): "Cheese pizza with cherry sauce, a Finnish classic for long winters."

Sarah (NY): "Brie-cheese pizza and jam? At first I thought this looked disgusting but after some thought, I'm on board."

Lauren (NY): "I thought it was pizza, but is that raspberry sauce? I could be into that."

Jennifer (Paris): "Some kind of pizza with some jam?"

13. A sauna

Flickr: saunaflow

Here, I asked what happens in this room.

Ailbhe (London): "You get uncomfortably warm."

Paul (London): "Everyone is naked and their pores feel just brilliant afterwards."

Tom (London): "Sweating, cleasing, casual sex."

Sami (NY): "This could be a sauna or a murder house."

Laura (London): "NSFW."

14. What we get every summer 🌞

Flickr: visitfinland

Finally, I asked how this makes them feel.

Laura (London): "Like England is shit."

Jim (London): "Fucking freezing."

Bryant (NY): "It makes me want to take a trip to wherever they are and jump into that water."

Jennifer (Paris): "I wanna be there right now."

Lauren (NY): "Ugh so jealous. You win, Finland."

Thank you to Ailbhe, Maggy, Flo, Jim, Matt, Laura, Paul, Jamie, Tom, and Robin from London, Juliane from Berlin, Jennifer from Paris, and Sami, Sarah, Bryant, and Lauren from New York for taking part.