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The Definitive Ranking Of All Roald Dahl’s Books

They’re all so good.

15. The Enormous Crocodile.

 

Inventiveness: 6. The enormous crocodile eventually dies because an elephant swings him by the tail and sends him crashing into the sun. An amazing ending.

Believability: 6. It could be a true story. Can you prove that crocodiles don’t eat children? Exactly.

Fun factor: 1. It’s about a child-eating crocodile.

14. Charlie And The Great Glass Elevator.

 

Inventiveness: 7. Charlie and his family use the chocolate factory’s elevator to rocket into space.

Believability: 2. Grandma Josephine takes a pill to make her younger and ends up being minus two. That’s not a thing.

Fun factor: 4. It’s good because it’s about space, but its got nothing on Charlie And The Chocolate Factory.

13. The Minpins.

 

Inventiveness: 5. It’s about a forest filled with Whangdoodles, Hornswogglers and Vermicious knids.

Believability: 4. Communities of tiny people could live in trees.

Fun factor: 4. Billy flies on the back of a swan, which just sounds incredible.

12. The Magic Finger.

 

Inventiveness: 5. The girl has a magic finger that can disfigure people she doesn’t like.

Believability: 5. It’s nice to think that one girl can put a stop to hunting by using a powerful appendage.

Fun factor: 4. Although it has a happy ending, it’s quite a sad story about hunting.

11. The Twits.

 

Inventiveness: 7. Tricking your husband into eating worms by telling him you’ve prepared him spaghetti is borderline genius.

Believability: 5. Tying someone to a bunch of helium balloons in order to get rid of them could work.

Fun factor: 2. Loses points for being a bit gross and very anti-beard.

10. George’s Marvelous Medicine.

 

Inventiveness: 6. Every child tried to make their own marvelous medicine after reading this.

Believability: 2. Making a magical potion to punish your grandmother out of slugs, snails, paint and toothpaste could feasibly work.

Fun factor: 7. There’s no revenge quite like feeding your grandmother a potion that sends her to space.

9. Danny The Champion Of The World.

 

Inventiveness: 3. It’s not magical, but the “Sticky Hat” is hands down the best poaching method.

Believability: 10. Possibly the only Roald Dahl book whose plot could actually happen.

Fun factor:. 3. Mrs. Clipstone smuggles pheasants through the village in a giant pram in a bid to outwit the landowner, which is pretty cool.

8. The Giraffe And The Pelly And Me.

 

Inventiveness: 9. It involves a giraffe, a pelican, a monkey and a small child as an elite window cleaning team.

Believability: 3. Giraffes don’t actually have extendable necks.

Fun factor: 5. There’s a burglar with a gun!

7. Charlie And The Chocolate Factory.

 

Inventiveness: 8. There’s lickable wallpaper, everlasting gobstoppers and meal-replacement chewing gum.

Believability: 3. No one actually lives in one bed with four grandparents.

Fun factor: 7. Mike gets stretched by a machine to correct having been shrunk earlier. Amazing.

6. The Witches.

 

Inventiveness: 8. The witches have square feet, no hair and claws instead of finger nails. ARGHHHH.

Believability: 7. Have you been to Norway? Can you prove that child-hating witches don’t live there? Thought not.

Fun factor: 4. Fun, but utterly terrifying.

5. Fantastic Mr. Fox.

 

Inventiveness: 8. The idea of cunning foxes who are capable of outsmarting people is just excellent.

Believability: 6. Animals don’t talk in real life.

Fun factor: 5. It all ends with a celebratory underground banquet prepared by Mrs. Fox. Yum.

4. Esio Trot.

 

Inventiveness: 9. Writing words backwards in order to cast some kind of growing spell on a tortoise is a great move.

Believability: 5. Alfie gets so big that he can’t fit into his owner’s house, which seems unlikely.

Fun factor: 10. Winning over your dream lady by making her tortoise grow is maybe the loveliest thing.

3. The BFG.

 

Inventiveness: 10. It’s about a friendly giant who blows good dreams into children’s windows.

Believability: 7. Nice though it sounds, using a giant’s ear as a method of transport is not practical.

Fun factor: 10. Sophie meets the queen! She enters the palace through a window! The queen!

2. James And The Giant Peach.

 

Inventiveness: 10. If you were an orphan and you entered a giant peach, it’d be amazing to make friends with magically-altered garden bugs.

Believability: 8. You can’t actually live in a peach.

Fun factor: 10. The peach flies! To America! Incredible!

1. Matilda.

 

Inventiveness: 10. The girl can make stuff move with her eyes.

Believability: 10. It’s entirely feasible that being really smart means possessing telekinetic abilities. It’s just going to take some practice, right?

Fun factor: 10. There’s a chokey and a character called Bruce Bogtrotter.

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