This week’s theme was “Love and Heartache”, which basically includes every song ever written.
Before we get into this, there are two noteworthy points.
1. SeeSee from Miss Dynamix (the pregnant one) fell ill, so the band didn’t perform this week. They’ve been given a pass to next week.
2. Louis Walsh wore a silk tie.
Right, let’s get started.
On Sunday night’s show, we had a group performance of Avicii’s “Wake Me Up”.
Robin Thicke is quite ‘head of sales at the Christmas party’ isn’t he? #xfactor
It’s always a pleasure to hear a Perry live vocal. #noitisnt #XFactor
10. Shelley Smith warbled Beyonce’s “Single Ladies”.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SHELLEY (your singing wasn’t very good). Despite surviving last week’s sing off, Shelley Smith didn’t really improve. I want her to be my aunt so much, but I don’t want to see her strutting her stuff to “Single Ladies”, soz.
She found herself in the bottom two on Sunday night.
Was that twerking? Did she just twuck? #xfactor
THIS FACT IS FULLY MENTAL.
Shelley is the same age as Sophie Ellis-Bextor #xfactor
In the sing off, she sang “Stop” by Jamelia.
It was OK. But Gary, Nicole and Louis didn’t think so and she was sent home.
9. Abi Alton ruined Kylie Minogue’s “Can’t Get You Out Of My Head”.
There were heart umbrellas, dodgy vocals and a load of pacing dancers. Here’s hoping Abi’s doing what she does best behind a piano again next week.
Abi you stepped out of your comfort zone and you did it! #PROUD #SCHERZYGIRLS
8. Rough Copy ran around a lot.
They sang “I Want It That Way” by The Backstreet Boys. The judges seemed to like it, but it felt like a distinctly safe choice. One of them was wearing a purple, leather kilt, though, which I <3.
I don’t understand why Rough Copy are always wearing skirts?! Am I missing something…
7. Kingsland Road sang Bruno Mars’ “Marry You”.
Kingsland Road would like everyone to know that they are single and available and you should vote for them. But, despite their excellent hair, you didn’t. And they found themselves with the lowest number of votes and in the sing off.
Thanks to everyone who voted for us tonight, we’re gutted. But as always, we’ll pick ourselves up, and sing for our LIVES tomo. All our love
Aaaaand if the singing thing doesn’t work out, they could become professional tan ambassadors.
They’ve got the money out of that fake tan machine this week. #kingslandroad #xfactor
On Sunday they sang Pink’s “Try”.
They flicked their hair a lot and looked very pretty.
6. Hannah Barrett shouted “Beautiful” by Christina Aguilera.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hannah Barrett cries a lot and feels really insecure. BUT WHY? She has an amazing voice, she’s a national singing competition on the telly and she’s bezzie mates with Nicole Scherzinger. A little less screeching and a lot less crying would do Hannah wonders.
i love you hannah Barrett! you bring tears to my eyes when you sing #xfactoruk
5. Luke Friend sat in a boat.
He dressed up as Oliver Twist and sang “Let Her Go” by Passenger in a boat. Why? “Because he’s sailing through to next week,” said a very smug looking Louis. But the vocals were good, and he’s quite cute so I like him.
Luke Friend looks like a cocaine-ravaged Joseph Gordon-Levitt playing Benny from Crossroads. #XFactor
This is like Gap Year: The Musical #xfactor
Worst Life of Pi remake ever #xfactor
4. Sam Callahan was really sexy.
He sang “I Won’t Give Up” by Jason Mraz and my heart melted a bit. He may not be the best vocalist in the competition, but my god he’s fit.
Sam can show me his vocals any day. Sorry I meant penis, he can show me his penis anyday. #XFacfor
But then he engaged in some light Twitter bribery, which was annoying.
If I get through to next week tonight I’ll do a follow spree on route home x
3. Sam Bailey taught everyone about love.
She dedicated Adele’s “Make You Feel My Love” to her husband and made me cry. We all know this lady can belt, but she held back and her stripped back performance was all the better for it.
Sam Bailey I’m still speechless
2. Nicholas McDonald kissed a dancer on the cheek and it was the cutest thing ever.
He sang Robbie Williams’ “She’s The One.” Here’s a three-line poem I wrote for him:
Nicholas McDonald you are so cute,
I’m really glad that you’re not mute,
I hope you never get the boot.
“It’s hard to sing a song about love because I’ve never been in love” No it’s not. I once sang Come On Eileen and I’ve NEVER done that.
1. Tamera Forster absolutely nailed “Beneath Your Beautiful” by Emeli Sandi and Labrinth.
OMG TAMERA IS SO PRETTY AND SO LEGGY AND SO TALENTED. We all know she’s going to win, right?