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Starting A New Term At Uni: Expectation Vs. Reality

Those resolutions never last long.

1. Expectation: You will only go out twice a week.

Reality: Drinking is necessary if you want to have fun.

2. Expectation: You will spend a maximum of one hour a day Facebook stalking.

Reality: For every 30 minutes of work you complete, you reward yourself with a 30 minute stalk.

3. Expectation: You will attend every lecture.

Reality: You make about three before your alarm clock mysteriously breaks.

4. Expectation: You’re going to colour coordinate your lecture notes and cross-reference them using your brand new coloured highlighters.

Reality: You forget to buy a folder so your notes are strewn all over the place.

5. Expectation: You’re going to run every day. Before breakfast.

Reality: You run to hall once. So you don’t miss breakfast.

6. Expectation: You’re going to take up a new hobby, like learning a new language or going to art galleries.

Reality: Booze eats your spare time.

7. Expectation: You’re going to enter into a mature relationship.

Reality: You’re going to bitch about people in mature relationships.

8. Expectation: You’re going to work out a life plan.

Reality: It’s likely to be fairly rogue.

9. Expectation: You’re going to stop drunk texting boys you fancy.

Reality: You’re going to master the art of composing the morning apology text.

10. Expectation: You’re going to put an end to drunken confessionals.

Reality: No, really. You’re going to master the art of composing the morning apology text.

11. Expectation: You’re going to stop pulling all-nighters and start getting 8 hours sleep a night.

Reality: You stock up on Pro Plus and Red Bull before term starts.

12. Expectation: You are going to attend a careers fair and find yourself a grad job.

13. Reality: You’ve resigned yourself to the fact that you’re facing imminent unemployment.

14. Expectation: You’re going to stop procrastinating.

Reality: This isn’t the first Buzzfeed list you’ve read today.

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