a stray had 3 kittens that i named otter, flounder, and neidermier from animal house. also, my little brother was terrible at naming pets. he named the cat patrick and his iguana chris. and his frog was just his own name jr.
i have two:
1) when i was eleven my brother and i were racing to my dad’s car and rather than yell “i call front!” i yelled “i call c*nt!” and we all just kinda stopped and let that soak in.
2) i had a bowl of candy at my desk at work and a customer came up and asked if she could…
i had a weird dream that i was frantically running into different bars and asking the bartenders if they had seen a “one-armed man named McDaniel”. in my dream i was super upset and desperate to find this one-armed man. when i woke up i texted my mom and told her about it. i got this…
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