1. The Socratic Method
1/2 oz poison hemlock
1/2 oz Greek wine
1/2 oz club soda
Walk around the room and engage in philosophical dialogue with your peers. Drink slowly and do not be hasty, as this drink has a belated kick. You may feel a numbing sensation throughout your limbs — it is advised to lay down and prepare yourself for a very long nap.
2. Paradise Lost
3 oz gin
Pomegranate juice (apple juice may be used if pomegranate is unavailable)
Garnish with sliced figs
Persuade your friends to join you in tasting this forbidden fruity drink. Warning: may awaken with regrets and shame over the sins of the night before.
3. Lady Macbeth
3 oz Scotch whisky (must be Scotch)
Muddled eye of newt and toe of frog
1 1/2 oz club soda
Wash hands well after mixing. Serve to cherished guests.
4. The Shylock
1 lb of flesh, finely grated
1 bottle Kosher white wine
16 oz sparkling water (preferably sourced from the Venetian canals)
Aperol to taste
Combine in pitcher — serves 4. Perfect to share with colleagues after a long, hard day of making financial deals.
5. Dante’s Fire & Ice
3 oz vodka
3 shakes tabasco
Shake in a circular motion, about 9 times. This drink has kick enough to fortify a hopeless soul!
6. The Count of Monte Cristal
Fresh blood orange juice
Sip while plotting revenge against all those who have wronged you.
7. The Percy Bysshe Shelley
3 oz sea water
1 1/2 oz vodka
Add ice and shake violently. Consuming too much of this drink may result in a sinking feeling.
8. Jekyll and Highball
3 oz whisky
Squeeze tart lemon
Muddled lemon rind and salt
Combine in a highball glass and stir. Tartness may cause violent reaction upon first sip.
9. Pitcher of Dorian Grey
1 bottle Grey Goose vodka
16 oz soda
Mix in a glass pitcher. After a few too many of these, be sure to check your appearance in the bathroom mirror.
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