Stephanie Mack: A History

This is only a Harry Potter pun if you’d like it to be.

1. Hello! My name is Stephanie Mack.

Via http://facebook.com

2. I recently graduated from Florida State University.

Rachel Johnson / Via http://facebook.com

Check out my résumé here!

3. Did I mention Florida State University?

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Party on, distant uncles and bored family friends. Party on.

4. BuzzFeed is the dream, y’all.

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After 2 cups of coffee and a mildly satisfying breakfast burrito, I decided to use BuzzFeed itself to explain why I would be a great fit for the company that changed the way people share information!

5. “Work hard, play hard.”

I may be last to leave the office, but I’ll always be first to help plan this month’s themed happy hour.

Alternate Endings:
… I’ll always be first to bring the extra ‘unused meeting pizza’ upstairs for everyone to enjoy.

… I’ll always be first to help make necessary matching sweatbands for the company dodgeball team.

… I’ll always be first to send laser-targeted GIF responses to your ‘TGIF’ email.

6. I try my best to liven up the office posting boards:

7. While I would never steal someone’s food from the office fridge, I know a greasy miracle when I see one:

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8. Let’s keep this party going with some background information, shall we?

9. I am an avid entertainment nerd, so dressing up for any sort of event or premiere is one of my favorite pastimes.

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The likeness is uncanny!

10. And then this happened.

We tried.

11. And this.

Despite the obvious sign, at least 5 people asked me if I was Seneca Crane from the Hunger Games. At The Avengers premiere.

12. Followed swiftly by this.

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Take a wild guess.

13. And a little of that.

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I am so, so sorry.

15. Additionally, if I encounter anything having to do with The Boy Who Lived, I will immediately take the most cringe-worthy photos mankind has ever seen:

Awkwardly ruining someone’s coffee date!

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Awkwardly hiding my depression that Diagon Alley wasn’t open yet.

Must have left the keys in my other robes… Awkward.

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18. Okay, so we all agree I have a pretty solid grip on the entertainment industry.

True, true. But that’s what personal websites are for, right?

19. So how could I contribute to the already amazing BuzzFeed Team?

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20. For starters, I know the importance of spotting pure moments of social media failure:

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No, YOU have a good weekend, American Airlines!

21. And having the good sense to document said failures for future use.

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Pure joy, in its lowest-quality Snapchat form.

22. Speaking of Arrested Development, here’s video evidence that God does indeed exist:

23. And I know that when it comes to taking selfies, great timing is the key to success.

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24. Last New Year’s Eve, 3 people from high school stopped me at a bar to yell, ‘You have the best cover photos!’

Arielle Calderon / Via http://facebook.com

Though 2014 had barely begun, I (sadly) knew those comments had already made my year. (Giving all the props to Arielle Calderon for this gem, though.)

25. There’s only one thing that could top it: Becoming a BuzzFeed Fellow!

Too much? Too much. Moving on.

26. Though I’ve come a long way since my first Facebook post, it’s moments like these that contributed to the unique voice I have today.

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28. Nope. Not one.

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