You’re in one state, your new job is in another state. At first, you’re like:
“OMG NEW JOB BESSSSSST #BYEHATERS #STARTEDFROMTHEBOTTOMNOWWEHERE!”
And then reality hits. OMG YOU’RE MOVING INTERSTATE.
You guys, shit just got so fucking real.
19. The countdown begins.
You have one month to move your entire world interstate. Aaaaaand, go.
18. All of a sudden, everything is a shitstorm of bullshit.
… And it is EXHAUSTING.
17. You need to find somewhere to live.
Great. I have no idea where my job is, or what areas to look in.
16. When you start looking, the rent is INSANE.
Like how do regular people even afford to live in this fucking city?!
15. Moving is expensive, and you’re broke as shit.
When did I accumulate so much STUFF?!?!
14. You don’t know how much furniture to move with you.
If I don’t have a house, how am I supposed to know how much stuff will fit in my new place? Would it just be cheaper to buy new stuff? WHY IS THIS SO HARD?!
13. You go to check out a place that sounds amazing, but it’s like:
Really? You think I can get a queen-sized bed, a desk, a bedside table and bookshelfs into this TINY ANT-SIZED CLOSET?! Is this Alice in Wonderland? Will my shit shrink the fuck down when it enters this room?
12. Checking out a place, and the room is perfect, but the roommates are like:
And you’re like:
… Maaaaybe this isn’t going to work out, after all.
11. Realising you need to make appointments to see your dentist, doctor etc. before you go.
Seriously though, when even was the last time I went to the dentist??
10. Realising that you literally don’t have enough hours in your day to get everything done.
Okay, I have work from 9 - 5 and everyone I love wants to hang out with me before I leave, and I need to make all these appointments. Fabulous, that’s fine, I don’t need to sleep at all.
9. Donating junk that you would actually like to keep, but don’t have the room for.
I know I don’t need my massive collection of Sweet Valley High novels that I’ve been hoarding in a cupboard since my tween years, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want them anymore!
8. When you procrastinate three full days away because you can’t even deal.
I know I need to be packing right now, but I just CANNOT DO IT RIGHT NOW.
7. Rushing around like a crazy person trying to clean everything.
6. Not knowing where the fuck you are or how to get anywhere.
“What’s going on? Where am I? How did I get here? How do I get where I need to be? How many bus changes do I need to make? WHAT IS HAPPENING?!?!”
5. When you unexpectedly start crying at your otherwise kickass going away party.
Such bullshit. Much anger. Wow.
3. Not knowing where to buy food/coffee/anything.
“I’m so hangry, you already know. I’m in the rage lane, from starving to furious.”
2. Not having any friends in your new city.
All of a sudden, you really, really relate to that Akon song “Lonely.”