Adam Brown - Ridiculous Human Being

Adam Brown has somehow convinced someone to marry him. Will this mean the end of some of the more ludicrous aspects of his behaviour? Is he now a proper, grown-up human man? Here is a countdown of some of the more ridiculous things Adam has done over the last ten years.

10. Quiz Call

Back when we shared a house with Adam, we soon learned that he had a particular weakness, an addiction that would often raise its head late at night after a few drinks. It was an expensive habit and one that we, as his housemates and friends, were incredibly concerned about. But in the small hours when he was a bit low and needed to feel good about himself, Adam would pick up the phone and...ring late night quiz channels.

In one year Adam racked up staggering phone bill and never once did actually get through, although it seems he wasn't the only one.

9. DJ Monkeyboy

Adam’s DJ’ing could often be summed up in two words – Press Play. From 'Lovers need Lawyers' to friends weddings, Adam could be relied upon to supply dubious mixes and look confused by any technology.

8. Shopping

If you've shared a house with Adam, you know that any shopping trip is not complete without copious amounts of the above. Indeed, it may be possible that Adam can survive on Bread and Toilet Roll alone...

7. Sense of direction

Adams sense of direction is notoriously hit and miss. Take this odyssey from our shared house on Lanvanor Road, Peckham to Bar Story, also in Peckham – A journey of 1.6 miles, estimated drive time of 9 minutes (or a 10 minute walk, if you aren't lazy)

This picture is the 19 mile route taken by Adam. Yes, he crossed the Thames.

6. Fancy Dress

Whatever the situation, whatever the party, Adam can be relied upon to dress in the most eye-catching way possible.

I can't emphasize how much Adam loves to dress up enough...

5. Name dropping

Whether it's Pete Doherty, Robbie Williams, or that guy from The Others, Adam can be depended on to drop a famous name into just about any story. Particularly if he can insinuate a knowledge celebrity misdeed into it.

4. Dating the girl from the ring

Adam has dated some interesting girls. As he's now a married man we wont go into too many details. My favourite was definitely Tammy, though.

3. As Purveyor of the Zeitgeist

How well do you know Adam? To find out, answer this simple question:

Adam tells you about this new bar that’s opened in Shoreditch/New Cross/Brixton, he tells you that famous person X was there last week and that it has unique selling point Y. It’s so cool, he was there on Friday and he ended up dancing with a midget/drinking a Y with X/meeting a cool Japanese artist who specialises in Penis-based plastic sculptures. Do you a) say Yes, let’s go tonight, or b) laugh in his face.

2. Taste in films/music/literature

How well do you know Adam #2? Adam suggests watching a film/going to see a band/recommends a book you should read. Do you...etc, etc.

Highlights (sorry, lowlights) that Adam has championed over the years include (yes, it's a countdown within a countdown):

10: Little Otik

9: Elephant

8: Luke Haines

7: The Human Centipede

6: The Others

5: Wetlands

4: Joyrides

3: Tampa

2: Nine Songs

1: The Last Minute

1. This...

Adam's dancing. It defies description. Observe the 3 greatest minutes of interpretive dance ever recorded.

It was a definite struggle to find 10 'appropriate' stories for this list. If you think we have missed any, feel free to add your #AdamBrownStorys