Bodega Cocktail Challenge

THE BODEGA COCKTAIL CHALLENGE: Make a cocktail out of mini bottles of booze and ingredients purchased from a bodega. This game was inspired by Broke-Ass Stuart’s reportage for our friends at The Bold Italic on bodegas in San Francisco who are packaging ingredients for DIY cocktails. Not to be outdone by California, we thought we’d try our hand at some bodega mixology. The results were… interesting.

1. BuzzFeed’s Bodega Cocktail Showdown

Our judges were BuzzFeed CEO Jonah Peretti, Cultural Director Jamie Urso, and Resident Garbage Disposal Gavon Laessig.

Legally Irresponsible Insanity Punch // Ryan Broderick

Fruit Punch Four Loko
1 can Mike’s Hard Lemonade
1 bottle 5-hour ENERGY
1 mini bottle Patrón
1 mini bottle Captain Morgan’s Spiced Rum
1 mini bottle vodka

Mix contents of mini bottles of liquor and 5-hour ENERGY with 1/4 can of Four Loko and 1/4 can Mike’s Hard Lemonade. Serve with gummy worms.

The Lucille // Whitney Jefferson

1 mini bottle Disaronno
1 mini bottle espresso vodka
Ginger ale
Pomegranate juice
Emergen-C (raspberry)

Mix equal parts Disaronno, espresso vodka, and pomegranate juice. Top with 6 oz ginger ale and 1/3 of the Emergen-C packet. Serve with pineapple slices.

Honey Badger // Scott Lamb

1 mini bottle whiskey
1 mini bottle brandy
1 mini bottle blackberry brandy
Honey
Lemon juice
Cinnamon
LOVE

Combine 1 part Whiskey with 3 parts hot water, lemon juice, honey, and cinnamon. Add a dash of brandy, 2 dashes of blackberry brandy. Garnish with lemon and serve with love!

The First Date by Sly
1 mini bottle of tequila
1 mini bottle of Barcadi Limón
1 Fruit Barrel (green flavored)
Coconut milk (preferably with chunks)
Lemon-Lime Kool-Aid

Rim the glass with Kool-Aid. Combine mini bottles of liquor, 1/2 of the Fruit Barrel, and 1/2 of the Jugo de Coco, stir. Sprinkle top of the beverage with Kool-Aid crystals, serve with Pork Skins, and go in for that kiss.

Sleep No More // Melissa Rosenthal

1 mini bottle Kahlua
1 mini bottle Bailey’s Irish Cream
1 mini bottle Smirnoff espresso-flavored vodka
1 can Illy Caffé coffee drink
1 bottle Starbucks Frappuccino coffee drink
1 can Illy Latte Cappuccino
1 container Häagen-Dazs

In a glass combine the mini bottles of liquor, mix thoroughly.
In a separate glass, combine ½ a bottle of Starbucks Coffee Flavored Frappuccino, ½ a can of Illy Cappuccino, ½ a can of Illy Caffé.
Mix together.
Combine both glasses and mix thoroughly.
Pour into a small glass .
Top with Coffee Ice cream and alcohol infused whipped cream If desired. Serve with a chocolate rose.

The Churchill // Josh Fjelstad

1 mini bottle of brandy
1 can of champagne
lemonade
ginger ale

Mix equal parts brandy, champagne, lemonade, and ginger ale. Serve with a cigar.

The Moo Moo // Matt Stopera
1 bottle of Yoo-hoo
1 mini bottle of Jäger
1 package of pudding mix

Combine equal parts Yoo-hoo and Jäger. Mix in 2 tbps pudding packet and serve.

Shock & Awe // Tanner Ringerud
1 Starbuck Double Shot
1 mini bottle Disaronno
1 mini bottle Smirnoff Root Beer Vodka
1 DynaPep Energy Micro Shot

Pour the Startbucks Double Shot in a glass. In another glass, mix the Disaronno, Smirnoff, and DynaPep Energy Micro Shot. Pour the alcoholic mixture into the Starbucks Double Shot and consume before the cream in the Double Shot has a chance to curdle. Serve with apple pie and baseball.

The Vodka del Rey // Lindsey Weber & Andrea Hickey

1 mini bottle Smirnoff Citrus
1 mini bottle Smirnoff Root Beer
Sprite Zero (can substitute only Diet Mountain Dew)
Hot-brewed Lipton Tea
Nerds

Hot-brew two packets of Lipton Tea. Add ice cubes to tea and place in freezer to cool. Mix Smirnoff Citrus, Sprite Zero in equal parts with a dash of Smirnoff Root Beer. Add cooled tea. Serve with a side of Nerds.

Coconut Cream Pie Shot // Hannah Grant

1 mini bottle Bailey’s Irish Cream
1 mini bottle coconut vodka
Ice cream-flavored Jelly Bellies

Mix irish creams with vodka. Add six Jelly Bellies and serve.

The Apple Bloom // Cates Holderness
1 mini bottle of Bacardi rum
Equal parts apple juice
3 hot tamales

Combine ingredients, stir and serve.

My Little Champagne: Vodka is Magic // Ashley Baccam

Tum-E Yummies (Fruitabulous Punch)
Tum-E Yummies (Orange-ariffic)
1 mini bottle vodka
1 can champagne

Mix all together and serve with Jolly Ranchers.

Love Me Tender: Fit for the King // Esther Smith

1 mini bottle Jack Daniel’s
1 bottle of Pepsi (diet or regular)
1 package cherry-flavored Jell-O

variation 1:
chill until semi solid and add sliced bananas, baco bits (not pictured), salted peanuts.

variation 2:
use less pepsi or more jello, pour into sheet cake pan and chill until solid, cut with heart shaped cookie cutters.

variation 3:
Fold in Cool Whip at the semi solid stage if you’d rather have mousse.

Serve with Peanut Butter, Banana, and Bacon sandwiches.

Shimmy Shimmy Coconut // Dikko Faust

Coconut Milk
Nutella
Coconut Frozfruit popsicle (cut off stick, chopped)
Coconut Rum

Mix coconut milk, a dollop of Nutella, coconut popsicle, and coconut rum. Swirl in dark chocolate hazelnut bar, softened in microwave OR break up choc bar, sprinkle on top and eat on the side.

Nacho Average Bloody Mary by eBaumsWorld

Coat inside of glass with Nacho Cheese.
One Part V8 to one part vodka.
Tapatio to taste.
Garnish with tortilla chip.

The Closer // RedEye Chicago

Start with 3-4 oz. of Boone’s Farm Fuzzy Navel, chilled. Add 1 oz Arizona Diet Peach Iced Tea (from 23 oz. can ONLY). Float Miller High Life on top. Garnish with sour peach gummy. End the party.
*Yes, this breaks the mini bottles-only rule. Mini bottles are illegal in Chicago. Go big or go home.

baroctails // Flavorpill

Berocca tablets
Bushmills

Berocca and Bushmills. Don’t ever fucking do it.

Bukocktail // eBaumsWorld

Protein shake
Bacardi Limón
Jell-o package (lime flavored)
Pineapple juice

Boil one cup of protein shake. Add one shot Bacardi Limón, and mix in Jello package. Add a splash of pineapple juice for flavor enhancement. Let sit in freezer until it achieves the desired consistency. Serve with dipping sticks.

A Lemon Party // eBaumsWorld

Lemon juice
Lemon wafers
Limoncello
Lemonade

Coat rim of glass with lemon juice, then dip into crushed lemon wafers. Add equal parts Limoncello and lemonade. Serve with wrinkly meat stick.

Photos and Design and Stuff from the desk of Amy Sly
Video Magic from the desk of Dorsey Shaw

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