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    16 Things Every Parent Should Never Show Their Kids

    You know when you show your kid something for the first time and then regret it until the end of time. That.

    1. How to use the stairs.

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    Which they now insist on using all the time, slowly.

    2. How to push a trolley in the supermarket.

    3. Your iPhone.

    4. The word "ouch".

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    Which they will scream in public, at will. Everyone will stare.

    5. The word "no".

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    Hope you like hearing it shouted!

    6. The word "more".

    7. How great straws are.

    8. How amazing chocolate tastes.

    9. Saying 'cheers'.

    10. How to "help" in the kitchen.

    11. How to make fart noises.

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    Which they save for when you're out in public.

    12. The remote control.

    13. The fridge and its contents.

    14. How fun it is to tear up paper.

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    Until it's a letter from HMRC.

    15. Where the bin is.

    16. The toilet.