1.Hi. We need to talk. In case you haven't noticed, Rosamund Pike's haircut is a thing of beauty.
2.No, really. Look at it from the side. Are you physically able to process the insane amount of perfection that is growing out of her head?
3.Because this crap is unfair.
4.Look at how it curves, ever so slightly, beneath her glorious jaw.
5.And gaze upon the effortless way her hair is tucked behind her ears.
6.You might be thinking, "Wow, Rosamund really has this whole perfect-hair thing down."
7.And you're right.
8.So, so right.
9.But we're gonna keep going because have you ever seen her rock an updo?
10.It is a structural feat of engineering that the Pyramids of Giza cannot match.
11.It is a work of art.
12.Full of magic and wonder.
13.This is no ordinary ponytail; it is a ponytail filled with the hopes and dreams of the Gods.
14.We must continue our journey into the world of Rosamundland. It is a free-thinking society in which hair must not always be straight or tightly pulled back.
15.Because, as Queen Rosamund knows so well, a bob looks freaking great wavy.
16.In Rosamundland, choppiness is heaven.
17.And one curl has the power to change the world.
18.Let your eyes rest upon this do — neither too curly nor too straight but a delicate balance brought to us by Mt. Olympus.
19.And surrender yourself to the image of the ruler of Rosamundland letting her people gaze upon her precious center part.
20.We must thank Rosamund's locks for their everlasting devotion to greatness.
21.For without those golden strands, we might have never glimpsed perfection in our lifetime.
