1. Any of these after midnight
Because we all know why you needed to eat any of these after midnight …
2. Mac ‘n’ cheese in a cup
Because hopefully we’ve acquired enough skill within four years of higher education to not have to eat powdered cheese.
3. Leftover Chinese food
When you come home late and the only thing left in your fridge is a sour container of milk and some Taco Bell hot sauce packets, and you spot the carton of fried rice you ate three (or was it four?) days ago and you grab it, all the while hoping that microwaving it will kill any bacteria its acquired marinating in the back of your fridge.
4. Pasta… for every meal
The first thing we learned when we moved off campus was how easy it was to make a grown-up meal by boiling pasta in water and adding canned sauce. We can still do that, just not for every meal because we’re too lazy to make a protein or a vegetable.
5. Calzone delivery
Gone are the days when we can call up the local D.P. Dough and choose between an endless list of calzone combinations, including that macaroni, cheese, and bacon “Mac Daddy” you told all your friends would be the best calzone ever created. And then sadly it wasn’t, but you sure as hell ate the whole thing anyway and pretended like it was.
6. Hot sauce on everything
You know you graduated college when people give you funny looks for putting hot sauce on your bagel with cream cheese. “What? It’s good!”
7. Those dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets
Don’t get me wrong, they’re still really cute. And you love biting off the heads or the tails feeling like a dragon slayer. But sadly, we should probably only see these little guys again until we have kids of our own.
8. That time you didn’t have milk so you combined these.
You make yogurt out of milk, right? So it’s like basically the same thing, right? Right? And then you learned the hard way that it is NOT the same thing. It’s just not.
9. You knew this one was coming
Ramen Noodles. We’ve all been there. You have about $3.72 left in your bank account and you know you need to eat at least two meals, so you grab the crinkly package, which comes out to as low as 20 cents a bag. Here’s to hoping the real world has given us more than $3.72 in our bank accounts so we can buy the can of Progresso instead.
10. And don’t forget the one in the cup.
Please see above description.