Takin’ Bacon Too Far

Bacon rules. But sometimes, there really can be too much of a good thing.

Bacon: That salty, sweet, tastiest of delights.

We put it on our grilled cheese burgers.

We’ve even taken to putting it in our ice cream sundaes.

But some people get just a tad Bacon-Crazy, though, and take it too far. People like:

1. The folks behind Bakon Vodka.

2. Whoever tried to carbonate it.

3. People who want to think of breakfast when they kiss their sweeties.

4. The 9 out of 10 dentists who are obviously in the pocket of Big Bacon.

5. People who thought lying to their dentist didn’t taste good enough.

6. The folks who thought “soap” wasn’t a clean enough scent.

7. The guy who wants the meat pieces out from between his teeth, but not the taste.

8. The other folks who thought “soap” wasn’t a clean enough scent.

9. The couple that wants to think about dead pigs when they’re being intimate with each other.

10. The recently departed whose love for bacon extends beyond this mortal coil.

11. The wine lover who wants bacon in his glass as well as on his plate.

12. The early riser who wants her bacon while she cooks her bacon.

13. The person who wants to smell like a pig.

14. The sandwich enthusiast who wants to skip a step with his cheesy BLT.

15. The Jersey Shore boardwalk stroller who didn’t want to leave his bacon at home.

16. The bacon lover who wants to taste the bacon without filling up on it.

17. The person who wants their milk to taste like bacon.

18. The kid who wants to look like he’s eating grown-up bacon while he’s actually eating strawberry gummy treats.

19. The Southerner who thought “cheese sticks” wasn’t grossing out the yankees enough.

20. The homemaker who wants their kitchen to smell of bacon without dirtying up the pots and pans.

21. The mayo lover who wants all the bacon of bacon without the bacon.

Baconnaise is a bacon-flavored mayonnaise that has zero actual bacon in it.

22. The woman who made a man out of bacon.

23. The guy who wasn’t content with only stopping his own heart with an overabundance of bacon.

24. The artists who’d rather look at their bacon than eat it.

25. The California couple that loved bacon so much, they wanted their car to try it.

Dan and Tracy Kaderabek, co-founding couple of Bio-Blend Fuels, created a car that runs entirely on the excess bacon fat collected when bacon is cooked. Certainly a car one wouldn’t mind being stuck behind in traffic, though.

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